


would you like fries with that?

by thunderylee



Category: Arashi (Band), KAT-TUN (Band), Kanjani8 (Band), KinKi Kids, NewS (Band)
Genre: 5 years of working fast food resulted in this, Borderline Prostitution, Canon Universe, Facial, Humor, Lots of side pairings, M/M, Recreational Marijuana
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-09-15
Updated: 2007-09-15
Packaged: 2019-02-07 15:31:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 23,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12844137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thunderylee/pseuds/thunderylee
Summary: Kamenashi Kazuya knew going in that he was overqualified for the job, but McJohnny’s was the only place that would hire him.





	would you like fries with that?

**Author's Note:**

> reposted from agck.
>
>>  
>> 
>>   
>    
>  **Glossary of Fast-Food Terminology**  
>    
>    
> 
> 
> frontline: area behind the counter where the registers are, but in front of the grill. The person assigned to frontline takes and fills the orders of the customers who come inside the restaurant.  
> lobby: the area in front of the counter where customers line up to have their orders taken.  
> grill: area where the sandwiches are made. Also the actual surface on which the burgers are cooked.  
> fryer: where the fries, chicken, fish, etc. are cooked. Emptied and cleaned every day by the maintenance employee.  
> fry hopper: machine that dispenses the fries into the basket. It’s a bitch to clean.  
> prep station: where the sandwiches are dressed and wrapped  
> bun toaster: nifty little invention where you drop bun halves into the top and they come out the bottom toasted. Also a bitch to clean.  
> condiment “gun”: contraption that shoots the condiment out by pulling a trigger. They’re fun.  
> sandwich warmer: this actually has a different name, but I can’t think of it. It’s where the finished products go while they’re waiting to be put into a bag or on a tray.  
> cooler: giant-ass refrigerator where non-frozen perishable food items are kept.  
> drive-thru “hole”: first window of a two-window drive-thru. It is considered a privilege to be assigned the “hole” because it is the only station with a seat. The other window is solely referred to as drive-thru, whether it is the only window open or not. At some places the “hole” is only opened during rush times or closed late at night when business goes down.  
> expeditor: person who bags orders for drive-thru and hands out orders for frontline, usually a senior employee or manager.  
> drive-thru “present” (the verb, not the noun): not mentioned, but included anyway. Usually where they stick new people who can’t do much more than make drinks and hand out food, which is all this position entails. Often the expeditor will perform this task as well.  
> OSHA: [look it up](http://www.osha.gov/).  
> intercom: some places have it set so that everyone in the grill area can hear what’s being said over the headset. This makes it easier for the grill employees to get a head start on what is being ordered. It also makes for good times when there are no customers. There are usually two buttons on every headset, an A and a B button, and the A button goes to the actual drive-thru speaker while the B button is strictly for headset-to-headset or intercom purposes. Often the shift manager or “leader” will wear an extra headset as a supervisory method, just to have everything covered.  
> mid-shift (mids): one which covers both lunch and dinner rushes. Usually reserved for senior employees.  
> EoD (End of Day) report: not stated by its name, but that’s what it is. A report that is supposed to be run at midnight after clocking everyone out, and then the manager manually clocks everyone back at 12:01. It prints out inventory for the day, monetary totals, and I’m sure there’s some other crap in there that I don’t remember. Not running the EoD at midnight is not as life-threatening as I made it appear, but not running it until the end of the night makes the close take longer. And who knows, McJohnny’s might require that was everything purchased after midnight be on a separate report/deposit, which would entail a lot of work and moving around of money and product. 

Kamenashi Kazuya knew going in that he was overqualified for the job, but McJohnny’s was the only place that would hire him after the controversy that would forever taint his resume. He had thought it odd that the interviewer hadn’t so much as brought it up; only the usual questions were asked:

“Where do you see yourself in five years?”

“What skills will you bring to McJohnny’s?”

“What are your views on homoeroticism as a selling tactic?”

Okay, so that last one was kind of weird, but Domoto Tsuyoshi was a weird kind of guy. Aside from looking as though he’d rather be anywhere else than sitting across a booth from Kame, the assistant manager had a hairstyle that was all different lengths and loud colors. He stared three inches to Kame’s left as he spoke and kept scribbling furiously on his Official McJohnny’s Interview Worksheet, which later proved to be nothing but a series of sketches. Kame’s favorite was the one where he had devil horns, bat wings, and a serious ‘I will eat your soul’ look on his face.

“I’m not even supposed to be here today,” Tsuyoshi informed him, eyes slowly glancing around the perimeter to make sure that they wouldn’t be overheard by any nosy employees. “Ohno called in sick. _Again_. Something about a rash. I don’t want to know. Aiba-chan took his shift, but he’s crap- I mean, _new_ at managing, so I was the designated asshole who was dragged out of bed at four a.m. to supervise him.”

“Excuse me,” Kame said politely. “Why do you call him ‘-chan’?”

“You’ll see when you meet him.” Tsuyoshi scanned through his drawings like they were some secret code for pertinent hiring criteria and flicked his eyes to Kame’s nose. “Can you start tonight?”

“I- uh…” Kame fidgeted with his tie. “The window says ‘flexible hours’.”

“Flexible means night and weekend shifts. Do you want the job or not?”

“Yes,” Kame said strongly. “Ganbarimasu.”

“Be back here at five.” After a brief nod, Tsuyoshi scooted out of the booth and sauntered back towards the counter, not even looking over his shoulder as he added, “If you’re not a complete moron, I might get more than two hours of sleep tonight.”

“Thank you…” Kame started, trailing off as his new boss gave him a halfhearted salute and hopped over the counter as opposed to simply walking through the opening.

“Don’t mind him, he’s deprived.”

Kame looked up into the cheerful face of ‘Ugly Taguchi’, if his nametag was anything to go by. “Deprived of what, exactly?”

“His soul,” Taguchi said seriously, whistling happily as he emptied the garbage containers next to Kame’s booth. “Would you like a soda or something? Aiba-chan makes the best tea.”

“No, thank- did you say tea?” Kame perked up and offered a smile. “I think I will have some tea, thanks.”

“Okay!” Taguchi clapped excitedly and bounced towards the counter, leaving the tied-up bags of trash in front of the container.

A pissed-off looking guy in a leader shirt with pigtails and abnormally large lips stormed through the side door and immediately narrowed his eyes at the abandoned garbage. “Taguchi!” he roared.

“Excuse me,” Kame said, standing up and bowing apologetically. “Taguchi-san went to get me some tea. I’m sure he intends to finish his job.”

The leader paused in his pursuit and eyed Kame warily. “Who the fuck are you?”

“Language, Tat-chan!” hissed someone from behind the counter.

“I’m not on the clock yet,” the man spat, looking Kame up and down like he was on the menu. “I’m Ueda Tatsuya. I say again: who the fuck are you?”

Kame shook his head. “Kamenashi Kazuya desu. I was just hired as a night employee.”

Ueda’s face lit up in a scary grin. “You’re one of mine, then. You start at five?”

Nodding, Kame wondered what he was getting himself into. “Aren’t you here a little early for a night shift?”

“I don’t have anything better to do,” Ueda replied, shrugging. “We’re always shorthanded because one douchebag or another calls in sick, so the rest of us who actually give a shit about our jobs get an assload of overtime.”

Taguchi returned with Kame’s tea and almost spilled it when he caught sight of Ueda. “Gomennasai, Ueda-kun. I will finish taking out the trash right away.” He bowed at Kame and handed over the cup, looking everywhere but at Ueda.

“Take Ugly Taguchi here, for instance.” Ueda wrapped an arm around the trembling Taguchi and patted his shoulder. “He works six days a week, ten hours a day. He has no family and no friends. His hobbies include mastering every video game ever invented and pretending to be a girl on the Internet.”

“That’s not t-t-true, Ueda-kun,” Taguchi stuttered. “You know I have a girlfriend.”

“Yeah, okay, and Gackt is tied up in my bed, naked and willing whenever I so much as _think_ about getting horny.” Ueda slapped his back and pulled away. “Take out the goddamn trash, will you? It smells like Nishikido’s ass in here. And when you’re done with that, you can wash the windows. Stupid children don’t know how to keep their hands off of shit.”

“But it’s time for my break -”

“Taking out the trash is like a break,” Ueda said in a fake comforting voice. “You get to go outside.”

“Leave him alone, Tat-chan!” called a perky voice, followed by a very attractive man in a button-down shirt and tie. He noticed Kame and raised an eyebrow at Ueda. “Fresh meat?”

“ _Mine_ ,” Ueda shot back, leaning against the trash receptacle as though his entire purpose in life was to hold it up. “You have your own.”

The other leader fluttered his eyelashes at Kame and grinned. “But he’s so pretty.”

“This,” said Ueda, gesturing towards the other man like he was making a grand announcement (or popping his wrist), “is Aiba Masaki. Leader-when-Ohno-is-out and an all-around good time, at least that’s what’s written on the bathroom wall.”

“Hey!” Aiba frowned, folding his arms. It made Kame sad just to look at him. “I thought I told Junno-chan to erase that!”

“I tried!” Taguchi called from halfway out the door, trash bags in tow. “It was written in permanent marker. Tsuyoshi-san said that he was going to have Koichi-san send a request to Corporate to have it repainted.”

“Yeah, I never did that,” Tsuyoshi said airily as he exited the bathroom, choosing to wait until he was in the presence of others to fasten his belt. He fixed Aiba’s right ear with a blank look. “You should just change your number.”

“It’s the number to the _restaurant_ ,” Aiba said insistently.

Tsuyoshi nodded once and cleared his throat importantly. “I’ll have Kouchan- I mean, Koichi-kun send a request to Corporate to have the number changed, then.”

Aiba stared at him wide-eyed as Tsuyoshi walked away.

“Who is Koichi-san?” Kame asked the other two.

“Your real boss,” answered Ueda. “He’s the store manager. Tsuyoshi is his assistant, emphasis on the _ass_. They’re real secretive about their relationship, especially since they have the same surname. Some people say they’re married, others say they’re brothers involved in a kinky incestuous affair. If you ask them, they’ll tell you that they don’t even have each other’s phone numbers, which is bullshit because they’re posted on the break room wall in sparkly pink construction paper.”

“You better go home, Kame-chan,” said Aiba. “You should take a nap before your shift. Tat-chan has been known to take until the morning shift comes in on the weekend to close.”

“Fuck you,” Ueda replied casually. “I’m not closing tonight.”

“Sure you are,” said Aiba cheerfully. “You’re highlighted as manager on the schedule.”

“Bull _shit_ ,” Ueda declared, shoving Aiba out of his way as he raced behind the counter.

Aiba grinned at Kame. “He really isn’t closing. I just like to rile him up.”

Kame nodded and smiled. “It looks like you guys have a lot of fun here.”

“Oh, yes!” Aiba bounced a little. “Morning shift is the most fun, but I might be biased. I miss Oh-chan, though. Woke up with the nastiest case of -”

“That’s enough, Aiba-kun,” said a booming, authority-filled voice from behind Kame. He swirled around to see a professional-looking, very short man in a uniform like Aiba’s, only his shoes had about a three-inch heel on them. “Kamenashi-kun, I presume?”

“See, I told you!” Ueda hissed very loudly to Kame, whacking Aiba in the back of the head with a clipboard as he returned to the group. “How would he know your name if Tsuyoshi-san hadn’t told him?”

Domoto Koichi closed his eyes long enough to inhale and exhale a little too deeply for someone who had just walked in the door. “Ueda-kun is not scheduled for three hours yet.”

“Overtime,” Ueda replied, wiggling his eyebrows. “Your wife approved.”

Snorting, Koichi narrowed his eyes. “Are you on my clock?”

Ueda smirked. “Is it two?”

As Koichi checked his cell phone, Gackt’s 'Papa Lapped a Pap Lopped’ filled the air, and Ueda hit a button on his own phone to silence it. “Now it is. Peace!” He flashed the peace sign with the middle finger of his other hand discreetly behind it and disappeared.

Koichi made his exasperated face for the second time in thirty seconds and turned his attention to Aiba. “Doesn’t Aiba-kun have something to do?”

“Yes!” exclaimed Aiba jovially. “Since Tat-chan is here early, I get to go home now. Bai-bai!”

“This bitch better be clean!” Ueda screamed across the store. “I will drag your happy ass back here to -”

“ _Language_ , Tat-chan,” Aiba said in a loud whisper. “You don’t want the customers to hear you talking like that, do you?”

“ _What_ customers?” Ueda yelled back. “Nobody actually comes _inside_ a fast-food joint anymore. We as a human race have gotten so goddamned lazy that rolling down the car window to order at the drive-thru is considered too much effort.”

“Domoto-san,” Kame began. “May I-”

Koichi silenced him by raising one hand. “Please do not ever refer to either me or Tsuyoshi-kun by our surname. It gets very confusing and sometimes dangerous. You may call me ‘Koichi-san’.”

“Koichi-san,” Kame tried again. “May I start early as well? I could certainly use the extra money, and well, I’m already here.”

Pursing his lips, Koichi thought for a moment before nodding slowly. “I think that would be all right. I don’t suppose anyone has shown you around yet?”

“If Aiba-chan is going home, I’m going home too,” Tsuyoshi announced, breezing past Koichi and Kame with his shirt halfway unbuttoned.

“It was nice meeting you, Tsuyoshi-san,” Kame called after him.

Tsuyoshi snorted as he opened the door. “You say that like you won’t see me again in three hours. I’m closing tonight.”

Aiba was right behind him, waving frantically on his way out.

Kame looked down at Koichi, feeling lost. “What shall I do?”

Frowning, Koichi surveyed Kame’s attire, his eyes lingering a little too long on the tie. “You’re about the same size as Ueda-kun. Let me see if his old employee uniforms are still in the back. Come along and I will give you a brief tour as we go.”

Kame followed Koichi behind the counter and through the grill area, where Ueda was barking at two guys with really shaggy hair to clean their stations. “I do not _care_ if you only have an hour of downtime at the end of your shift. There is no reason my crew has to do all of the dirty work. This shit is pristine when we leave; it should be that way when we come in too.”

“Good afternoon, Koichi-san,” the two employees chorused, smiling charmingly.

“Sakurai-kun, Matsumoto-kun.” Koichi led Kame over to them. “This is the grill and prep stations. You probably won’t spend a lot of time back here. Yamashita-kun and Ueda-kun are usually able to handle everything themselves.”

“Yeah, because I’m the only leader who actually works around here,” Ueda grumbled. “What did Aiba-chan do all day, sit in the office with Nino’s thumb up his ass?”

“I resent that!” called a voice from the drive-thru. “We were short-handed, asshole.” A small man poked his head around the corner and gave Ueda the finger before pushing a button on his headset and flashing a sinister smile. “Would you like a cold, frosty beverage with that?”

“Ganbatte, Ninomiya-kun,” Koichi said casually, heading towards the supply area. “Always upselling, that one.”

“I worked in sales at my last job,” Kame offered. “I was the top -”

“This is where we keep everything that’s not cold,” Koichi said in a flourishing manner, with the air of someone who had absolutely no idea what he was talking about. “Ueda-kun will give you a proper tour later, I’m sure.”

“After the dinner rush,” Ueda hollered. “Can’t you entertain him until then? Make him watch those gay safety videos or something. Besides -” he appeared in the doorway, Matsumoto’s head squished under his arm “- I’m not closing tonight.”

“I haven’t seen the schedule,” said Koichi shortly. “And the safety videos are not _gay_. The customer service ones are.”

“My. Bad.” Ueda rolled his eyes and dragged Matsumoto out of sight by his hair, muttering under his breath, “… bet he doesn’t even know where we _keep_ the schedule.”

Koichi conveniently ignored him, leading Kame through a maze of racks and boxes until they reached a small room that was completely secluded from any kind of life in the store. “This is the manager’s office. You won’t be in here at all, because there is a camera and I will know.” Kame made sure to stand outside the doorway as Koichi rustled around in a box and pulled out a crisp uniform shirt and pants. “Ueda-kun only wore this for one day. We knew he was leadership material when he got a chocolate shake thrown at him by a customer and he simply turned around and made another one, the smile never leaving his face.”

“How long ago was that?” Kame asked, finding it hard to believe that they were talking about the same person whom the security cameras behind Koichi showed chasing Matsumoto around the grill with the sour cream gun and screaming, “I thought you liked it in the face, Jun-kun?”

“Seven years.” Koichi grinned proudly. “The only other leader who’s been here longer is Tsuyoshi-kun, and he just got promoted to assistant manager.” He tossed the clothes to Kame. “I assume you know where the bathroom is?”

Kame couldn’t get out of there fast enough. Something about his new boss gave him the creeps. Ueda caught up with him by the counter, the sour cream gun still pointed at Matsumoto’s head. “After you change, shadow Ugly Taguchi until the dinner rush. Oh, and everyone on my shift has an awesome nickname on their nametag. If you don’t already have one, I get to pick it for you. Those are the rules. Do you have one?”

“Um…” Kame peeked down at Ueda’s nametag and read the kana for ‘Uebo-hime’.

“Not my idea,” Ueda said firmly, reddening slightly before standing up straight and looking intimidating. “So what’s your nickname?”

Kame searched his brain for something awesome. “Kame…”

Ueda stared at him. “That’s boring.”

Kame shrugged.

“Ueda-kun!” squealed Nino, appearing out of nowhere and grabbing Ueda’s arm. “This heinous bitch in the drive-thru wants to talk to a manager. I assume you don’t want me to bother Koichi-san.”

“Like he would know what to do,” Ueda grumbled, shaking Nino’s hands off of him. “How he got to have his own store is anyone’s guess. Bakanishi has better people skills than Koichi does.”

“Who is -” Kame started.

“You’ll meet him if his lazy ass decides to show up for work tonight,” Ueda cut him off. “I have to go. Customer Service is Serious Business. It’s written on the break room wall.”

“Personally,” Nino whispered as Ueda raged away, “I think Koichi-san sucked off Johnny-sama himself. He was just a leader before he went to Corporate for some convention and the next thing we all know, this is his store.”

Matsumoto and Sakurai nodded agreeably.

Kame smiled forcibly and headed for the bathroom, where he changed quickly and decided to save the restaurant’s phone number (underneath a scribble that read ‘Aiba Masaki, an all-around good time – for rent or own, contact Ohno Satoshi at’) to his cell phone. He found Taguchi in the girls’ bathroom filling the toilet paper dispenser.

“I don’t think I need to show you how to clean a toilet,” Taguchi said with a grin. “Although you’d be amazed how dirty women can be.”

“I wouldn’t know,” Kame replied. “I have all brothers.”

Shadowing Taguchi was boring. Kame already knew how to clean up after people, and to be honest there weren’t that many people to clean up after. By the time four o’clock rolled around, Taguchi had wiped the same tables five times, mopped the floor twice, and told Kame his life story and how to get to the highest level of Final Fantasy 7.

“Lunch time!” Taguchi cried excitedly, ushering Kame up to the counter so he could clock out. “Ueda-kun, I’m going to lunch!”

“Whatever,” Ueda – or rather, Ueda’s backside – replied from under one of the fryers. “Fucking maintenance douche. Did he even come in today?”

“Who?” asked Taguchi.

“The maintenance guy,” Ueda repeated, backing out enough to show his face. “Taki-something. What’s his damn name?”

“Takizawa,” Nino supplied. “He was here this morning. All of the fryers were fine. What time are NakaNaka getting here?”

“Either four-thirty or five, depending which one is scheduled first.” Ueda snorted. “That’s Tsuyoshi’s idea of humor, scheduling them at different times when they live together.”

“Are they brothers?” Kame inquired.

Ueda shook his head. “Heterosexual life mates. You’ll see when they get here.”

“Where’s the schedule?” asked Nino. “Koichi-san doesn’t have it, does he?”

“Is he still here?” Ueda made a face. “No, I have the schedule. I like to keep it on me for when my employees call in sick and I have to play ‘whose fake illness is within health code’.”

“For someone who’s not closing tonight, you’re sure acting like you’re in charge,” said a sultry voice.

Kame whipped his head around to see a tall kid with really bad hair and a dangerous smirk. His pants looked a little too tight on him, but that might have been intentional.

“Bakanishi,” Ueda acknowledged the newcomer. “How nice of you to join us today. Tell me, have you recovered from the explosive diarrhea that plagued you last night?” He nudged Kame. “Akanishi Jin, overall dumbass, reigning champion of the title ‘Most Call-Ins without Repeating a Disease or Getting Fired’.”

“I have, thanks for your concern.” Jin ran his eyes very obviously up and down Kame’s entire form, licking his lips. “I’m also known as the new employee breaker-inner… guy.”

Kame raised an eyebrow. “Are you hitting on me?”

Ueda sighed. “Get used to it. Akanishi is the equivalent of Sexual Harassment Panda around here. The Amazing Domoto Duo refuse to fire him, though. I can only imagine why.” His tone implied that he knew exactly why.

Jin sucked his finger into his mouth, pushing it in and out suggestively. “Because I am a model employee, of course. I have turned down offers to be leader -”

“Seven times,” Ueda finished for him. “Yes, we all know. Clock in and get to work. You’re already late.”

Winking at Kame, Jin leaned over him to punch his code into the system and pulled a visor from under the counter. “I’ll catch your act later,” he said under his breath before disappearing into the back.

Ueda chuckled. “I’d suggest you go with him to help stock up, but being alone with Akanishi Jin isn’t really first-day material. How about you take a break?”

“Okay,” Kame quickly agreed. “Where do we smoke?”

A satisfied grin spread across Ueda’s face. “You’re all right, kid. I’ll show you where we go.” He leaned his head backwards and yelled at the top of his lungs. “Akanishi! I’m going on break! You’re in charge! Don’t set anything on fire!”

“I’m still here,” Koichi called out tonelessly from a table in the dining room where he was surrounded by a mountain of paperwork.

Ueda turned to Nino. “Akanishi is in charge. Make sure he doesn’t do anything too entirely stupid. I’ll only be gone for five minutes, but history has taught us that five minutes is long enough for disaster to strike. Twice.”

Nino yawned. That seemed to be good enough for Ueda and he made a beeline for the door, pulling Kame with him. They settled on a curb by the parking lot, each lighting their respective cigarettes.

“So, Kame,” Ueda said conversationally, exhaling his drag towards the sky. “You plan on sticking around for awhile, or is this just something to bide your time until you find a ‘real’ job?”

“Um -”

“‘Cause if you’re going to leave me hanging, let me know now.” Ueda flicked his eyes towards Kame quickly before looking away. “I won’t tell any of the higher-ups or treat you any differently. I just like to know when I’m going to get fucked.”

“I-I don’t know,” Kame answered honestly. “I kind of have a bad reputation. I don’t think I’ll be able to find decent work in this town again.”

Ueda nodded understandably. “I used to be in a band. I know what you mean.”

Kame blinked. He started to say “eh?” but a loud, syncopated rhythm caught his attention, accompanied by some very X-rated rapping.

Two guys were approaching the store, both in employee uniforms and a considerable amount of gold accessories. The one beat-boxing had the biggest nose Kame had ever seen and lips that rivaled Ueda’s, while the other had spiky silver hair and a gangster lean.

Nino hung halfway out of the drive-thru window and tossed his headset to the rapper, who caught it in mid-air. “I’m so glad Koki-kun was scheduled earlier today! Please let me go now, Ueda-kun? I have a hot date.”

“Holy shit,” said Ueda, a surprised expression adorning his face. “I just might have my entire shift tonight.” He turned towards the building. “Get the fuck out of here, Nino. Tell Ohno I hope his rash goes away, preferably by tomorrow morning so he can open.”

“Will do.” Nino disappeared from the window and was out the door twenty seconds later.

The man named Koki put on the headset and made no effort to go inside; instead, he pulled out a cigarette and joined Kame and Ueda by the curb. “It’s not four-thirty yet,” he said to Ueda’s glare before pushing the in-store intercom button. “Yo, Bakanishi. This is the voice of God. God says to find the other headset and wear it until NakaNaka’s too-sexy-for-your- _face_ asses get in there. Peace.”

“If it isn’t the Ambiguously Gay Duo,” Jin’s voice came through the headpiece two drags later. “You know I’m in here by myself, right?”

“Koichi-san is here,” Koki pointed out. “I see his compensating-for-being-five-foot-two hotrod.”

Jin paused. “You know I’m in here by myself, right?”

“I’ll go in,” offered the other Naka, whose nametag read ‘Maru-Hana’, giving Koki a gentle pat on the back. He nodded at Kame as he headed towards the building. “New boyfriend, Tat-chan? How did you get him to wear your old uniform?”

Ueda snorted while Koki doubled over in hysterical laughter.

“Yo,” Jin’s voice rang out. “Where’s the fucking schedule? I can’t -”

Ueda grabbed the microphone, nearly choking Koki in the process. “Don’t swear on the headset, idiot.”

“What time does Pi get in?”

Ueda exhaled forcibly. “When he gets here.”

“You’re mean, Tat-chan.”

“I thought you weren’t closing tonight,” said Koki. “I told these fine ass bitches we ran into on the way here to meet us at three. If you’re closing, I have to change it to sunrise.”

“I’m not closing,” Ueda grumbled through gritted teeth. “Tsuyoshi will be back in a half hour.”

The beat-boxing returned over the speaker and Koki free-styled until a bell chimed. “Got it!” Maru declared. “Welcome to McJohnny’s. How may I service you today?”

Koki made stupid faces as some guy ordered a burger and fries, mouthing along with the other’s well-practiced “Would you like a cold, frosty beverage with that today?” “Upsell, upsell, upsell!” Koki mocked, turning to Kame with a grin. “Did they make you watch those gay videos yet?”

“Not yet,” Kame replied in a small voice, savoring the taste of his smoke. “I’m supposed to do it when it gets busy.”

“Aw, Tat-chan, you’ve lost your touch.” Koki chuckled fondly. “On my first day, he threw me a headset and wished me luck.”

“Nakamaru had already worked here for three months and I was short two people,” said Ueda. “You knew how to do everything by the tried-and-true method of pillow talk training.”

“We don’t share a _bed_ , asshole,” spat Koki. “Yuichi hogs the covers.”

Ueda scrunched up his nose in disgust. “What part of anything I have ever said in my entire life led you to believe that I wanted to know that?”

“Ta-tsu-ya,” Maru sang over the intercom. “Phone for you.”

“Tell them to call my cell,” Ueda replied carelessly.

“It’s a manager call,” Maru clarified. “Do you really want me to give an angry customer your number?”

“Koichi is in there.”

“Do you really want Koichi-san to take this call?”

“I hate you, Nakamaru.” Ueda sighed and put out his cigarette. “I’ll be right there.”

“Take this,” said Koki, shoving him the headset. “Usual Friday night line-up?”

“You know it.” Ueda threw the headpiece around his neck and belted the strap around his arm, thumbing over his shoulder at Kame. “Get him set up with the gay videos, will you? And keep him away from Akanishi.”

“Will do.” Koki stomped on his smoke and waited until Kame was done as well. “Let’s go, new kid. You got a name?”

“Kamenashi Kazuya.”

“Tanaka Koki.” Koki grinned lopsidedly. “That was Nakamaru Yuichi, my partner in crime and overall shit instigation. I think you’ve met everyone else. Oh, except Yamapi, but he’s not important. Yamashita Tomohisa comes in between six and ten-thirty on Friday nights, depending on when he wakes up, and that’s our whole shift.”

“He sleeps until ten-thirty at night?” Kame repeated.

“He has three jobs,” Koki explained as they walked back inside. “He doesn’t really sleep at all. He has to pay for all of those bastard kids he unknowingly donated sperm for.”

“Stop talking shit on Pi,” Jin said seriously, holding a spatula like a sword. “I’ll kick your ass.” He paused, eyeing Koki like he had stolen his ice cream. “What are you doing with the new kid?”

“Showing him gay videos,” said Koki. “And you are not allowed to go into the break room while he’s there.”

Jin pouted. “Why not?”

“Hurry up, Koki-kun,” Maru hollered after them. “It’s starting to get busy.”

“Two cars in a row is not busy,” Ueda chided, flinging wrapped burgers into the warmer and racing around to the frontline to bag them. “It’d be nice if Nakamaru and I weren’t the only ones working, though.”

“Do you need help?” Koichi asked from his corner, lifting his head in concern. “Tsuyoshi-kun won’t be back until six.”

“As long as he will be here to close,” Ueda said sternly, “I do not care.”

“What’s the game plan, Tat-chan?” Jin asked excitedly. “Do I get to cook tonight?”

Ueda tossed a bag on Maru’s station and gave Jin a condescending look. “Do you honestly think I’m stupid enough to have both you and Yamashita running the grill? As much as I hate this place, I do not wish for it to be set aflame tonight.”

“What are you talking about?” Maru said with a smirk. “You love this place. You’d live here if there was a shower.”

“Shut up and smile,” Ueda snapped, flashing a very bright, very fake grin as a customer walked in the door. “Akanishi, frontline.”

“Hel _loooo_ ,” Jin drawled in English, skipping to the counter. “How may I satisfy your hunger today?”

Koki led Kame into the break room and motioned for him to sit down on a hard-looking plastic chair. “Okay, here’s the deal,” he said briskly. “You don’t have to watch the gay videos as long as you can remember key points from each of them, not because they’re important but because we make fun of them constantly. I will inform you of said key points and then you can fuck around until someone comes in here looking for you.”

“Okay,” said Kame reluctantly.

“Number one,” Koki went on. “Sexual Harassment Panda. It’s okay to flirt with your coworkers, but if you ask them out and they say no, you’re not allowed to ask again.”

“What if -?” Kame began.

“Number two. Don’t cover your mouth when you sneeze and use the same hand to greet someone.” Koki demonstrated with Taguchi, who was stuffing his face at the next table. “Number three. Upsell, upsell, upsell! If a customer asks for food and no drink, ask them if they want a cold, frosty beverage. If they order a combo meal, ask them if they want to upsize it for less than the cost of used panties. If they order it already upsized, ask them if they would like to top it off with a warm apple pie.”

“Two for a dollar,” Taguchi chimed in. “For limited time only, even though it’s been like that since before I was born.”

“Yes.” Koki nodded. “Number four. The customer is always right. Except when they’re wrong. Number five -”

“Chotto matte,” interrupted Kame.

“- if someone pulls a gun on you, don’t try to be a hero. Flail around like a little girl and squeal, ‘Dame! Dame!’ That is the Official McJohnny’s Code for attempted armed robbery.”

“If they’re not armed,” added Taguchi, “point and laugh at them. They hate that.”

Koki folded his arms expectantly. “You got all that?”

Kame blinked. “I guess.”

“‘Kay.” Koki hesitated in the doorway. “The stupid posters on the wall should cover everything else. Come on, Taguchi, your lunch is up.”

Kame watched Taguchi clean up his mess and follow Koki out of the break room, leaving him alone. He glanced around the room and saw several signs: ‘Customer Service is Srs Bsns’, ‘Upsell like Your Mama’s Kidney Depends on It’, ‘The McJohnny’s Internet is NOT for Porn’ (with ‘NOT’ conveniently crossed out), and ‘Employee Directory – Prank Call and Die’. Just like Ueda had said, Koichi and Tsuyoshi’s phone numbers were at the top of the list, pasted in what looked like glittery cut-outs. ‘Captain Oh-chan’ followed, along with several other names Kame recognized and a few he was pretty sure weren’t real people – Oshiri Misete, for one. He added his name and number underneath Shabutte Nechan, whose contact information was oddly enough the same as Aiba’s.

The phone rang and Kame darted his eyes around the empty room, wondering if he was supposed to answer it. Before he could make an executive decision, Maru leaned half of his body through the doorway and snatched it up, balancing himself on one foot as he greeted the caller politely.

He frowned as he recognized the voice. “Do you know what time it is? You better not be calling in. Tatsuya will have your balls on his chain.”

The caller said something to make Maru laugh. “Tsuyoshi-san isn’t here yet and Koichi-san left to go to the bank. Tatsuya is in charge. Call his cell if you want to talk to him. I have to go. Ja ne.” He hung up and winked at Kame before leaving.

The next hour passed by very, very slowly. Kame heard pieces of inappropriate conversation from the grill as he read the OSHA posters with minimal interest and checked his friends’ list on LiveJournal just for something to do. He was perusing through the latest _Potato_ scans when Jin fell dramatically to the floor behind him with secret sauce in his God-awful hair.

“Don’t ask,” Jin said huffily.

“Wasn’t gonna,” Kame replied distractedly. [Hiraoka Yuta](http://wiki.d-addicts.com/Hiraoka_Yuuta) had gotten insanely hot and Kame made it a point to check out his latest dorama.

“Tat-chan says for you to go to lunch,” Jin went on, crawling to the nearest chair and making a big production of hoisting himself up into it. “I’m on break so I’ll show you what to do.” He lit up a cigarette and used a half-filled cup of soda as an ashtray.

“We can smoke in here?” Kame asked incredulously.

“Koichi-san is gone for now,” said Jin. “Tat-chan is busy, and Tsuyoshi-san has been known to smoke at the grill when the dining room is closed. Speaking of, I’m supposed to call him.” He peered at the second sparkly phone number and punched it into the phone. “If you don’t want to pay for your food, I suggest getting Koki to make you something while Tat-chan is covering me. He’s a real douchebag about things like that, yet he purposely cooks too many chicken nuggets at the end of the night so they have to be ‘wasted’ and taken home to his refrigerator. Oi, Tsuyoshi-san. Where the hell are you?”

Kame watched intently as Jin heaved the sigh of a thousand men and slumped in his chair like the end of the world was among them. “You don’t sound like you’re sleeping to me. Is that Koichi-san’s voice in the background? You can _not_ do this to us – it’s Friday night! Nobody wants to see Ohno’s fug mug before the sun rises.”

Kame was about to ask if it was okay to speak to a superior like that, then thought better of it and decided to sneak over to the grill for a free meal. Koki slyly hooked him up with a two-hour-old chicken sandwich and grabbed him some fries that were about to be past their time.

“Kamenashi!” Ueda yelled from the frontline, snapping a bag open for emphasis.

Kame froze, hiding the food behind his back and preparing himself for a lecture.

“You have until the dining room closes to think of an awesome nickname for yourself. Akanishi has already thought of one, but it’s in English and probably retarded.”

“Okay!” Kame called back, rushing back to the break room with his food before Ueda could catch him.

Jin was posing promiscuously on one of the tables when he returned, blowing smoke rings towards the door. “Like what you see, Turtle Power?”

Kame facepalmed and busied himself by eating his lunch. “I thought I wasn’t supposed to be alone with you.”

“Shit happens,” Jin replied, grinning proudly like he had just said something smart. “Because of our special Friday Formation, I get to train you _all night long_.” He did something with his lip that Kame was pretty sure was supposed to be sexy, but he came off looking very strange.

“Looking forward to it,” Kame said dryly. “I figured I’d be working the counter tonight.”

“Oh, you’ll be working it all right.” Jin chuckled deeply. “Around eight o’clock the schoolgirls start coming in. Some of them come just to see me. You’re not that hard on the eyes, so we might be able to pair sell ourselves into some tips.”

“What do you mean, ‘pair sell’?” Kame asked skeptically.

“Usually Pi does it with me,” said Jin, “but Tat-chan gets pissed when he leaves his station. Pretty much you just have to look at me like you’ve never seen anything so beautiful, speak seductively to me, and bump into me accidentally-on-purpose every so often. The girls love it.”

Kame frowned. “What if I don’t want to?”

“Then I keep the tips.” Jin shrugged. “I’m not going to split them if you don’t make the effort to earn them.”

“What kind of tips are we talking about?” Kame asked, only slightly intrigued.

“Let’s just say one night I walked out of here with close to ten thousand yen.”

“I’m in,” said Kame, glancing at the ‘Customer Service is Srs Bsns’ sign above Jin’s head. “Although I find it hard to believe that McJohnny’s condones this type of behavior.”

“Condone?” Jin scoffed. “Honey, they _encourage_ it. Why do you think there are only males working here? Did you not get to witness the pure sex show that is Ohno and Nino earlier today?”

“Ohno-kun was out sick,” Kame informed him. “Something about a rash.”

Jin made a face. “I should make an appointment to get checked out then. Thanks for the head’s up.”

“Anytime.”

“But anyway, ‘Ohmiya’ are the top ranking pair sellers in McJohnny’s history. They narrowly beat out Koichi-san and Tsuyoshi-san, but only because upper management is excluded in the ratings. At their prime, however, the Dynamic Double Domoto were quite the adorable chibi rabu. Then Tsuyoshi-kun got fat and Koichi-san got promoted.”

“I don’t think he’s fat,” commented Kame. “He’s just a little eccentric.”

“He’s fatter than _me_ ,” Jin said firmly, as though that decided it. “At any rate, now that you’re here, I finally have a full-time partner. You’re prettier than Pi, anyway.”

Kame wrinkled his nose. “Thanks?”

“NakaNaka try,” Jin went on, “but they’re simply not good-looking enough. They are popular with the male customers, though, mostly because of the beat-boxing and rapping. Koki used to be black.”

Kame choked on his tea, which wasn’t nearly as good as Aiba’s. “What?”

“In high school, Koki spent a year in America as an exchange student. He stayed with a black family. Therefore he used to be black.”

“O-kay,” Kame said slowly.

Jin put out his cigarette and got to his feet. “My break’s over. You’re supposed to go back to the dining room with Taguchi after you’re done. He leaves at seven, at which time the dinner rush should be over and we’ll have an hour of downtime before the Friday Night Fangirls start coming in.”

Kame nodded. “Got it.”

Jin blew Kame a kiss and disappeared, leaving him alone once again. Kame finished his food and had a quick smoke before his thirty minutes were up and he had to squeeze between the prep station and Ueda’s lower half that was sticking out from underneath the fourth fryer again. “Fucking Takizawa,” he was mumbling. “I cannot have only three fryers on a Friday night.”

Kame waded through the sea of people with his best smile plastered on his face, searching the crowd for Taguchi. He saw a few dirty tables on his way and did his best to gather up the trash, amazed at how many customers the small fast-food joint attracted. He found Taguchi around the corner, up to his arms in overfilled trash bags, and rushed to help him take it out.

“Thank you so much, Kame-kun,” Taguchi said once they were outside. “It’s a madhouse around this time. I’m glad I get to leave soon.”

“Who cleans the dining room after you leave?” Kame wondered out loud.

“Jin,” Taguchi answered, his face falling. “But he doesn’t do a very good job. He’s scared to go into the girls’ bathroom because one time he forgot to knock and ended up walking in on a girl in the midst of a feminine product switch. He’s been traumatized ever since.”

“I can imagine,” sympathized Kame.

They returned to the building and Taguchi handed Kame a damp rag to wipe the tables while he mopped up a spill by the counter. Kame took the opportunity to watch his new coworkers from the other side, highly impressed with how Ueda handled about four different tasks at once as expeditor, handing out orders for Jin while bagging for Maru, running the fryer, and dashing back to the prep station every so often to wrap sandwiches for Koki. His speed of service time was the best at this location, at least according to the chart on the wall of the break room.

“Mommy,” a little boy asked the woman next to him, tugging on her sleeve and pointed to Ueda. “Can I wear my hair like that?”

“No, honey,” the woman replied. “You’ll look like a girl.”

Kame frowned and finished cleaning the tables, taking care to catch the crumbs in his hand and toss them in the trash so that there wouldn’t be that much to sweep up later.

After about an hour of crying babies, Ueda yelling at everyone to move their asses, and a spectacular display of sparks and smoke when Jin tried to use the fourth fryer, the customers slowly dwindled down. NakaNakaNishi attempted a three-way high-five as Ueda ran for the bathroom with one hand clutching his crotch and an unlit cigarette hanging out of his mouth.

“Good night, everyone,” Taguchi announced, clocking out and waving happily as he flounced out the door.

“Still no Tsuyoshi-san?” Koki asked, standing on his tip-toes to peer over the top of the sandwich warmer and glancing around the store. “Ueda can’t close tonight. I have shit to do tomorrow and I like to sleep. A lot.”

Jin blindly made his way to the frontline with fourteen sleeves of cups and lids, two boxes of assorted sauces, and a bag of chibi meal toys. “I’d offer to stay for you,” he said, tossing half of his supplies to Maru, “but I have to be back here at eleven. I do mids on Saturday.”

“And you and Yamashita aren’t allowed to run the grill together,” pointed out Maru.

“Where is that baka, anyway?” asked Jin. “He didn’t have to work last night.”

Ueda returned, looking much happier, and fixed Jin with a knowing look. “Why, did he come over and care for you during your attack of explosive diarrhea?”

“As a matter of fact, he -”

“Stop,” Ueda said firmly. “Do not finish that sentence, because it will in no way be funny and I don’t want to leave you in charge while I throw up violently for the next hour.”

Jin frowned. “You’re mean, Tat-chan.”

Gackt’s voice pierced the air again, and Ueda flipped open his phone to answer it. “Yeah… Eh? I don’t know, nobody tells me shit around here.” He glared hard at Jin. “When are you coming in?” He sighed. “Fine. I’m going to call in someone for a few hours then… Because I need to give out lunch breaks, that’s why. Have you ever felt the wrath of a hungry Akanishi? Yeah, okay, whatever. Later.” He turned to Maru. “Since you’ve pissed me off the least today, you get to pick. Koyama or Tegoshi?”

“Tegooooo,” Jin sang, dancing behind the counter with a broom. “He’s so cute and fun.”

“Tego’s on for tomorrow morning,” Koki called from where he was scrubbing the grill. “Unless you’re going to let him out of it, you won’t see his ass in here past eight.”

“Fuck.” Ueda pulled the schedule from his pocket and flattened it on the counter. “Koyama or Massu, then.”

“Massu’s off today for a reason,” Jin said cryptically.

“Why don’t you just call Nishikido?” suggested Maru. “He’ll give you a hard time, but he’ll come in.”

“I would rather run this entire store by myself than ask Nishikido Ryo for anything,” Ueda grumbled, heading towards the break room. “I’m calling Koyama.”

“Good luck,” Koki hollered after him. “It’s past noon. He’s bound to be fucked up by now.”

“Never fear, for I am here!” a loud voice sounded from the door, attached to a person who flailed to the counter and instantly engaged Jin in a complicated handshake that lasted a minute and a half and ended in a highly inappropriate groping session.

“Thank _fuck_ ,” said Ueda, jogging back to the front and exhaling in relief. “Koyama will be here in ten minutes because he is so my bitch, and because I promised him the drive-thru hole and maybe a blowjob from Yamashita. Yamashita, you’re on grill with Koki until Tsuyoshi-san gets here, which is now looking like nine or ten, at which time Koki will relieve Koyama and I will run the grill while Tsuyoshi-san stands around the frontline looking pretty under the pretense of playing manager. Break when you get a chance and clean your stations as you go. Got that, brats?”

“What do you want me to do?” Kame asked cautiously.

Ueda’s eyes fell on him and he paused. “Follow Akanishi around until I think of something better.”

Jin smirked sinfully.

“Stay in my sight,” Ueda added, pointing directly in Jin’s face. “Or someone else who is not Yamashita’s sight. If you disappear with him, Akanishi, I will make you take out the trash after dark.”

“B-but it’s _dark_ after dark,” Jin replied, biting his lip nervously.

“So don’t disappear.”

Loud rap music blasted from the back of the store, instantly lowered as Koki and Yamapi rushed to find the volume button. “Ready!” they shouted, both tying bandanas around their heads.

Maru popped open his register drawer and handed it to Ueda to take back to the other window, holding down the in-store intercom button on his headset and beat-boxing along with the music. “R-re-r-re-ready.”

Jin grabbed Kame by the collar and dragged him behind the counter, standing incriminatingly close to him in case someone should walk in. “Ready,” he breathed, mouth inches from Kame’s.

Someone really did walk in, but it wasn’t a customer. “Hey, Akanishi found himself a partner!” he cried, trotting past the counter and clocking in. “‘Sup, new kid, I’m Koyama Keiichiro. You’re kind of cute. Maybe now our shift can win the upsell contest.”

“Koyama-kun doesn’t know when to shut up,” Ueda said to a panic-stricken Kame, who was still being hovered over by Jin, before turning to Koyama. “Get your ass in the hole and don’t talk to me until you leave.”

“Okay,” Koyama said happily, taking the headset from Maru and heading towards his station. “By the way, Ueda-kun, Ryo-chan says you’re a pussy for not asking him to come in. He knows you can’t live without him, and he thinks you’ll feel much better after you admit that – loudly – in front of everyone.”

Slowly, Ueda reached for the sour cream gun; Koyama squeaked and ran out of sight. “I’m going to lunch,” Ueda announced, removing his headset. “Yamashita, you’re in charge.”

“Why not me?” Jin asked in a breathy voice, not taking his eyes away from Kame.

“Yamashita was actually a leader for awhile,” Ueda explained. “Until what, your third kid?”

“Yeah,” said Yamapi. “Then I couldn’t do the required leader shifts and asked to be demoted.” He yawned widely. “I think I will supervise like Aiba-chan and take a nap.”

“I didn’t hear that,” said Ueda, grabbing his jacket. “I’m actually leaving the premises, so seriously guys, don’t do anything stupid. I’ll be back in a half hour.”

Everyone waved and watched intently as Ueda walked out the door and got into his car. Once he had driven away, Yamapi hopped up on the bun table and began pointing fingers. “Maru, make me a chocolate shake. Koki, make me a sandwich -”

“Yamashita, blow me,” Koyama’s voice sounded over the intercom.

“Chotto _matte_ ,” Yamapi hollered towards the back. “Let a man eat first.”

Kame snuck out from under Jin’s spell and started lining trays, sensing the other’s eyes on him. “There’s nobody here to show off for,” he said under his breath.

“Practice,” Jin replied simply, sauntering up to Kame and leaning over his shoulder. “We need to beat Ohmiya.”

Struggling not to close his eyes and give in, Kame jerked his head to the side and watched Maru put together an order in the drive-thru. “Shouldn’t you be teaching me the register or something?”

“When we have a customer, I will.” Jin’s breath was hot on his neck, his hands bracing the counter on either side of Kame. “You know, it might be more effective if you keep fighting me.”

“Yo, Akanishi, can I get some help here?” Maru snapped, throwing a packet of barbeque sauce at Jin’s head. “Just because you don’t have any customers doesn’t mean I don’t. And Koki’s back there by himself because Yamashita passed out in the break room.”

“How hard is it to bag up some food and hand it out the window?” Jin shot back, squinting up at the monitor and mouthing the syllables out loud as he attempted to decipher the shorthand.

Kame watched him, paying attention to what was placed in the bag in accordance with what code was on the screen. He watched how Maru dropped a basket of fries into the fryer and how he scooped them into the different sized boxes when they were cooked and salted. He watched Koki dress the sandwiches and wrap them in their respective wrappers, tacking stickers onto most with the special order printed on them.

“Okay,” he said decidedly. “I got it.”

Jin turned to glance at him in bewilderment as Kame nudged him out of the way, taking over and lowering the speed of service by twenty percent by the time Ueda came back.

“All right, newbie!” Ueda congratulated him. “Think you can handle handing out food while I send NakaNaka on lunch?”

Kame nodded eagerly while Jin pouted at both of them. “What about me? I haven’t had my lunch yet.”

“You’ve been at lunch since you walked in the fucking door,” Ueda told him. “I’m going to go to the office and get some manager shit done before it gets busy again.” He banged on the wall connecting the break room. “Wake up, Yamashita! Johnny-jiji doesn’t pay you to sleep!”

Yamapi stumbled out of the break room, rubbing his eyes as Koki and Maru shoved past him with an assortment of food and closed the door behind them. He continued towards the front, knocking his knee against every single corner on the way and laying his head on Jin’s shoulder before promptly dozing off again.

“You can’t sleep on me here, Pi-chan,” Jin said quietly, stroking Yamapi’s hair that was sticking out of his bandana.

“You’re comfy,” Yamapi said sleepily, wrapping his arms around Jin’s waist and squeezing him tight.

A group of giggling girls entered the restaurant, all stopping in their tracks when they saw Jin and Yamapi. “Kawaii!” one of them squealed. “Oh, I was just going to grab a shake, but let’s eat here instead!”

Jin gave Kame an ‘I told you so’ look as he peeled Yamapi off of him and sent him back to the grill, conspicuously smacking his ass before presenting the girls with his full attention. “And how may I satisfy your hunger tonight?”

As they ordered, Kame made their drinks and set them down on a tray in front of the girls. “Douzo,” he said politely.

“A new one!” another girl exclaimed. “McJohnny’s always has the best bishies working here. That’s why we keep coming back!”

“I have a problem,” Jin said in a very serious tone. “I simply cannot decide which one is cuter. What do you think?”

“That guy is much better looking,” said the first girl, pointing to Kame. Her friends nodded their agreement.

Jin slid down the counter towards Kame and chuckled when he flinched. “This one doesn’t seem to like me, though.”

An idea occurred to Kame; he flashed Jin his best smile before ghosting his hips with his hands and tilting his head to look up at him. “Maybe it’s not you who I like.” He spun out from under him and skipped to the back, where he blinked up at Yamapi until he got the hint.

Kame darted his eyes to the side in time to see Jin dropjaw and the girls bounce happily. Trying to hide his smirk, he lifted a hand to Yamapi’s face and looked deeply into his eyes. “Suki da yo,” he said in a loud whisper.

Yamapi giggled and blushed a little, fumbling to finish wrapping the sandwiches and send them up. “Boku mo… suki.”

Sulking, Jin placed the food on the tray and presented them a little too forcibly. The girls ignored him, focusing on Kame and Yamapi as they chose a booth in direct sight of the counter.

Yamapi leaned his head next to Kame’s and spoke under his breath. “How far do you want to take this?”

“Whatever will piss Akanishi off,” Kame replied just as quietly, nuzzling his face against Yamapi’s and caressing his jaw.

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Yamapi chuckled. “You don’t know what happens to Jin when he gets mad.”

“Oh, get a room,” snapped Koyama, shoving past them to grab a soda. “This is a restaurant, not a goddamned host club.”

“I respectfully disagree,” said Yamapi smoothly, leaning his head back to press his forehead against Kame’s, their mouths almost touching. “This is part of the reason I still work here.”

Koyama ignored him as he spotted the girls in the dining room. “Hello, ladies,” he said suavely, taking his soda and joining them at their table. Two of them actually acknowledged him, but their eyes were glued to Kamepi.

“I’m going to kiss you now,” Yamapi whispered, not giving Kame any time to protest before closing the minimal distance between them and pressing their lips together.

Kame heard the girls shriek, but it was more like background noise as he kissed back and felt Yamapi’s strong arms embrace him. He angled his head as they broke apart only to come back together over and over again, and Kame almost jumped when Yamapi’s tongue ran along his bottom lip.

“Stop me,” Yamapi hissed almost inaudibly, lowering his hands to Kame’s hips. “Stop me now.”

“Da _me_ ,” Kame said in a fake high-pitched voice, gently pushing Yamapi away from him. “Da-”

“Don’t say it again or Ueda-kun will think we’re getting robbed,” Yamapi interrupted him sternly, falling completely out of character. “Didn’t you watch the videos?”

“Yes?” Kame responded, confused. His lips were still tingling.

“Way to go, geniuses,” said Jin bitterly, smacking them both upside their heads. “They actually paid attention to Koyama and now they’re leaving.” He looked at Kame in disappointment. “And here I was thinking you were a natural.”

“They still ate here,” Kame pointed out. “And I kissed someone who wasn’t you.”

Jin narrowed his eyes, silently fuming. “I’m going to lunch. Try not to fuck on the prep station while I’m gone.”

Yamapi saluted him as Jin stormed towards the break room and flung open the door. “What the…” Jin was forcefully yanked into the room and the door was instantly closed, no further noise audible.

“What if someone comes in?” Kame asked, suddenly frantic. “I don’t know how to use the register.”

“Relax,” said Yamapi. “Koki and Maru’s lunches are about up. If someone comes in before then, just run and get Ueda-kun. He’s just jerking off back there anyway. That’s what ‘manager shit’ translates to.”

Kame leaned against the fry hopper and folded his arms in dissatisfaction.

Yamapi gasped. “You _like_ him!”

“Who? Ueda-kun?” Kame made a face.

“ _No_ ,” said Yamapi with his loud, annoying laugh. “ _Jin_. You like Jin!”

“I do not.”

“Do too.”

“Do not.”

“Do too.”

“Do _not_.”

“Do too,” said Ueda, shoving them apart as he walked by. He stopped and glanced around the room. “Where is everyone?”

“Lunch,” Kame and Yamapi replied in unison.

“I’m over here, not like anyone cares,” said Koyama from the empty dining room.

“We don’t,” Yamapi assured him.

Koyama started to retort, but a loud beep stopped him. “I’ll still waiting for my BJ, Yamashita,” he said pointedly as he made his way back to the drive-thru hole to take an order.

“You and everyone else,” Yamapi replied airily. “I can only take so much at a time.”

“Yeah, but it’s Koyama,” Maru pointed out as he clocked back in and returned to his station. “He can only count for like half.”

“I heard that, asshole,” Koyama boomed over the intercom.

“Don’t swear on the headset!” Ueda shouted. “What the fuck is wrong with you people?”

“Temper, temper,” said a smooth voice from the other side of the counter. “Tatsuya, how many times have I told you that you need to calm down or one of these days you’re simply going to explode.”

Ueda’s pigtails bounced angrily as he whipped his head around towards his visitor. “If I ever do explode, Nishikido, I hope it’s all over your ugly face.”

The man smirked and flattened both palms on the counter, meeting Ueda’s glare. “You _would_ like to spooge in my face, wouldn’t you?”

Chuckling, Ueda grinned sardonically. “Oh, more than anything.”

“Ryo-chan!” Koyama squealed, running up to the counter and hopping over it to hug his friend. “What are you doing here?”

“Making sure Tatsuya doesn’t need my help.” Ryo surveyed the crew and nodded satisfactorily. “Looks like you’re still a bit shorthanded. Does Akanishi have the gout again?”

“That was last week and he’s at lunch,” Ueda replied crisply. “Tsuyoshi-san will be here later as well. I’m fully staffed.”

“What time can I leave, Ueda-kun?” Koyama asked sweetly.

“When Tsuyoshi-san gets here,” said Ueda. “Should be any minute now.”

“Yamashita!” Koyama shouted. “If you’re going to blow me, it better be soon!”

Yamapi rolled his eyes. “If I’m going to blow anyone, it’s not going to be you!”

“Kamenashi, then?” Ueda snorted. “I saw you two sucking face on the security camera. Nice work, newbie.”

“Thanks,” said Kame proudly.

“Who the fuck is this?” Ryo raked his eyes over Kame much like everyone else had done. “He looks like more of a girl than you do, and you’re wearing fucking pigtails.”

“Kamenashi Kazuya desu,” said Kame. “And you are?”

“Nishikido Ryo.” Ryo puffed out his chest, which Kame thought made him look a little bit pregnant. “I _started_ this pair selling shit back in the late nineties. I was underage, so that made it even better.”

Ueda leaned up to whisper in Kame’s ear. “If you let him keep talking, he’ll try to tell you that he started McJohnny’s as well, from the womb, and the only reason he lets Johnny-sama run the show is because he has better things to do.”

“Why aren’t you a leader again, Ryo-chan?” Yamapi asked innocently, batting his eyelashes.

Ryo’s face fell. “Because those damn Domotos have it out for me, that’s why. They keep trying to fire me and I keep coming back.”

“Nishikido, you’re fired,” Tsuyoshi said nonchalantly as he walked through the door, looking like he had just rolled out of bed, at least judging by his hair. “Get out of my building.”

“You can’t fire me when I’m not on the _clock_ ,” pointed out Ryo. “Besides, who’s going to do your mids tomorrow?”

Tsuyoshi got into his face, which was ineffective since Ryo was about a foot taller. “Where were you at ass o’clock this morning when I was forcefully yanked from my warm, comfy Kou- I mean, _bed_ to cover for Ohno?”

“I’m on mids tomorrow,” Jin announced as he clocked back in. “Go ahead and fire him, Tsuyoshi-san. Won’t bother me any.”

Ryo rolled his eyes. “Shut up, Fat Jin.”

“Fat Jin! Fat Jin!” Koyama squealed.

“Koyama, go home,” said Tsuyoshi strongly. “Why are you here anyway? I don’t like you.”

“You don’t like me because I slept with your _husband_ ,” Koyama taunted, pounding fists with Ryo. “Ooh, sick burn.”

“Either buy some food or get the fuck out,” Ueda barked at them. “You’re tainting my aura.”

Ryo whipped out his wallet. “I’ll take a fish sandwich and an order of fries. And I know what tarter sauce looks like, you ass fucks, so don’t try to substitute it with your own ‘secret sauce’.”

Jin lingered to Kame’s immediate left as he attempted to take the order, if ‘lingering’ meant draping over Kame’s shoulders, covering Kame’s hand with his own and pushing the buttons for him.

“I guess you’re not mad at me anymore,” Kame muttered in amusement.

“Aren’t you forgetting something?” Ryo said pointedly to Kame. “Or did you not watch the gay videos yet?”

Kame lifted his eyes to meet Ryo’s and smirked seductively. “Would you like a cold, frosty beverage with that tonight?”

“Oh, he’s good,” said Ryo, clearly impressed, nodding more to himself than anyone else. “And yes, I would. Medium chocolate shake.”

“Ordinarily we would give him the fish combo meal,” Jin whispered heatedly into Kame’s ear. “But since he already gets an employee discount and is more or less an asshat, you ring them up separately.” Kame could have sworn that he felt something hot and wet against his skin, but he could have been wrong.

“I’ll get your order,” Ueda said with a nasty grin, dropping a frozen piece of fish in the fryer on his way to the grill.

“In that case, I’ll take the ‘secret sauce’ after all,” Ryo called back to him. “Make it a good one, Tatsuya.”

“I don’t get it,” Kame hissed to Jin. “Don’t they hate each other?”

“Only when they’re not having sex,” Jin replied. This time he was definitely tonguing Kame’s ear. “It makes sense to them.”

“You know,” said Ryo conversationally, “the last time I checked, I am not a teenage girl, nor am I Yamashita, thank God. I have no desire to watch you two hump each other.”

“Practice,” Kame and Jin responded together.

“Akanishi!” called Ueda from the back of the store. “I need your… um, assistance.”

Jin released Kame and leaned against the counter, looking confused. “What could I possibly help him with other than jerking- Oh! Be right there, Tat-chan!”

Kame looked helplessly at Ryo. “Is everybody fucking each other around here?”

“I’m not fucking anyone right now,” Yamapi volunteered, hopping on the counter and exchanging inconspicuous fist-pounds with Ryo. “I’m scared that my boys are strong enough to impregnate a male.”

“Actually,” said Ryo seriously. “I did miss my period this month.”

Yamapi’s face went pale for half a second before Ryo and Koyama cracked up and Yamapi stomped back to the grill area. “Asshole. I haven’t even fucked your dumb ass.”

“Are NakaNaka here?” Ryo asked suddenly, looking around the corner and nodding up to Maru when he caught sight of him making an architectural wonder out of dipping sauce. “I’m bored. Give me a beat.”

Maru started beat-boxing over the intercom again, and as if on cue Koki jumped in with a rhyme from the drive-thru hole. Ryo snapped his fingers in tune with Maru, alternating hands every few measures and then using both of them in a way that Kame was sure would stick with him for the rest of his life, maybe even longer. It was just that catchy.

“Where did Tsuyoshi-san go?” Kame wondered out loud.

“Manager’s office,” Ryo and Koyama replied together. Koyama added, “He’ll spend the entire evening in there once the dining room is closed.”

“Fair warning,” said Ryo. “Doko has been known to randomly show up on Dots’ closing nights. He doesn’t acknowledge anyone, nor is he in uniform – he just goes straight back to the manager’s office and then you don’t see him again until it’s time to leave.”

Ueda flew back to the front and halfway collapsed on the counter, looking exhausted. “You and your goddamned tarter sauce,” he growled at Ryo, tossing a bag in his general direction. “Nobody orders fish around here. It took three of us to open the fucking can.”

“I bet,” said Ryo. “How many did it take to get you off?”

“Just one,” Ueda said breathlessly, using what looked like the last of his energy to wiggle his eyebrows. “But I was thinking of you, tied up and _begging_ for it.”

“I’ll remember that,” said Jin, feigning hurt as he made Ryo’s shake. “Maybe now I can write off my carpel tunnel as workman’s comp.”

“You already called in with that one back in ’03,” said Ueda. “It would be considered a pre-existing condition.”

“Damn.” Jin slid the shake across the counter to Ryo and saluted him. “Douzo, fucker.”

“Ueda-kun,” said Kame in a small voice. “May I take a break?”

Ueda lifted his head up from the counter. “Yeah, I could use a cigarette too.”

“Me too,” said Jin. “Can we close the dining room yet?”

“Not until eleven,” said Ueda. “And you’re not smoking inside.”

“That you will know of,” Jin muttered under his breath.

“I totally heard that.” Ueda sighed. “Drag Tsuyoshi’s ass up here, will you? He’s supposed to be on frontline until the dining room closes.”

Jin faced the back of the store and bellowed at the top of his lungs, “TSU-YO-SHI-SAN!”

“I could have done that,” Ueda mumbled. “Bakanishi. Come on, Kame-kun, let’s go.”

Kame followed him, grabbing some water on his way out – Jin’s tea was definitely not tasty at all. Ryo and Koyama joined them, hopping up onto the open hatch of Ryo’s station wagon and popping open some beers.

“You didn’t see this,” Ueda said to Kame as he hid behind Ryo and accepted a can.

“I won’t see anything if you give me one,” Kame negotiated.

Ueda smirked. “You’re going to fit right in here, kid.” He chugged half of his beer in one go and handed the rest to Kame. “That’s all we can have. McJohnny’s blood alcohol limit is equivalent to six ounces of pussy beer, which is of course all Nishikido drinks. And besides, he’ll try to take advantage of me if I drink anymore.”

“You wish,” said Ryo gruffly, leaning back to bump against Ueda and falling against him with a relaxed sigh.

Ueda shrugged him off. “Do I look like your fucking pillow?”

“Pillows don’t talk back,” Ryo said sensibly. “They’re also not bony.”

Koyama nudged Kame. “We should probably leave them alone. Come on, I’ll show you where we go to get high.”

“I don’t really -”

“I’ll show you bony,” said Ueda fiercely, grabbing Ryo by the collar and throwing him down against the floor, straddling his waist and pinning his hands behind his head.

“O-kay,” said Kame uncomfortably, allowing Koyama to lead him out and across the parking lot to a group of trees, where he politely declined the offer and stood aside as Koyama lit up a joint and exhaled into the night.

“What the hell are you doing?” Koki’s voice hollered from the drive-thru window.

Koyama chiefed his next hit and giggled. “Fucking!”

“Oh, okay!” Koki yelled back. “I’ll tell Tsuyoshi-san that. He’s looking for Kamenashi.”

Kame paled, but Koyama cracked up. “You do that!” He slapped Kame on the shoulder. “Calm down. You’re on break.” His face lit up. “We really can mess around, if you want.”

“Pass,” said Kame, sucking down the rest of his cigarette. “I should get back inside.” He hoped Jin didn’t really think that he was having sex with Koyama in the bushes.

Koyama frowned. “Fine, but you should let Yamashita blow you at least. Sucks like a Hoover, that one. Everyone says so.”

“He’s blown _everyone_?” Kame said incredulously as he stomped out his smoke.

“All thirty-seven of us,” said Koyama with a cheesy grin. “Yamashita’s mouth is like a bank – everyone has made a deposit.”

Blinking, Kame left Koyama to his own devices and jogged back inside. Just in time, too, as a large group of teenagers were flooding the lobby and Tsuyoshi was running around like a chicken with his head cut off.

“Where the fuck is Ueda?” he demanded of Kame, tossing him an empty bag and not waiting for an answer before storming back to the prep table. “Back up NakaNishi. If he’s fucking Nishikido in the parking lot again, I’m going to ream him.”

Maru brushed by Kame to finish bagging a frontline order he had taken on the second register. “You smell like pot,” he whispered.

“I didn’t smoke any, I swear,” Kame hissed back, reading the monitor to see what was needed next. He spotted Koki helping out in the grill, flipping burgers and toasting buns.

“There’s some Incriminating-Scent-Be-Gone spray in the break room,” Maru went on. “Don’t ask. Just use. If Tsuyoshi-san catches a whiff of you, you’ll never hear the end of it.” He snatched Kame’s bag. “Go. Now. While he’s not looking.”

Kame raced for the break room, hiding behind Yamapi when Tsuyoshi turned around to nag him for more meat. He found an unmarked container on one of the tables and tested it out, discovering it to be very pleasant and dousing himself before running back up front. He discreetly returned to his spot without Tsuyoshi noticing a thing.

“Much better,” said Maru when Kame leaned over him to catch a glimpse of the order before it was sent.

“Kawaii!” his customers cried, clutching onto each other as the one ordering stumbled over her words.

Maru and Kame exchanged a Look. Jin glared from the next register, but Kame paid him no mind. Koki, however, stopped dead in his tracks and almost let the meat burn as he stared expressionless at Nakame.

“Where is the button for upsizing?” Maru asked innocently, fluttering his eyelashes at Kame. “She wants to make it… bigger.”

“I can make it bigger for you,” Kame replied sweetly, reaching around Maru to coax his finger to what was probably the wrong button. He felt Maru chuckle as he inconspicuously jerked their hands to the correct one, but it was quickly replaced by a different noise as Kame settled his chin on Maru’s shoulder and blew puffs of air onto his neck.

“I want mine upsized too,” said one of the girls.

“Me too onegai.”

Something banged angrily in the grill area. Kame’s fingers intertwined with Maru’s as he changed the other girls’ orders, leaning back against Kame and sighing softly when his neck made contact with Kame’s lips.

Jin huffed and grabbed Kame by his arm, pulling him away from Maru and flush against himself, licking his lips as he stared down into Kame’s eyes. “I need your help, Kazuya.”

Kame’s knees almost buckled at the intense gaze. He stared at Jin, at a loss for words.

“Aw, Akanishi is jealous,” mocked Maru, talking more to the girls than to his coworkers. “Who will Kame-chan choose? Maybe whoever sells the most food?”

Kame was entirely not paying attention, lost in the depths of Jin’s dark eyes. Jin’s grip on his arm tightened at Maru’s challenge. “I will win you,” he said evenly.

The customers were more than happy to oblige both contestants, upsizing and adding items to their orders while Kame rushed to fill them and managed to keep a tally of totals at the same time, making sure to pay special attention to both Maru and Jin when he had the opportunity to do so.

When the shake machine sputtered at him, coating his hand in shake mix and chocolate syrup, Jin got there first. Without taking his eyes off of Kame, he held Kame’s hand to his face and licked it clean, taking care to get between each of his fingers with a flicking tongue. Kame made it a point to wash and sanitize his hands before refilling the shake mix and carrying on, but the feeling of Jin’s tongue and lips on his skin remained.

Maru retaliated by squatting down to grab more fry boxes while Kame was scooping them up, using one hand to trail up Kame’s leg while he dug the boxes out of the cabinet with the other. Kame had to bite his lip to keep his body from reacting, especially when Maru’s fingers reached his inner thigh and kept going. He wasn’t sure whether to stop him or pause to enjoy it, but Maru chose that second to casually drop his hand and continue stocking like nothing had happened.

Koki’s voice sounded like ice in his ear as he dropped some chicken nuggets into the fryer. “You. Me. Drive-thru hole. Downtime.”

He was gone as fast as he had arrived, but Kame was uneasy nonetheless. He continued ‘performing’ with both Maru and Jin, much to the delight of the seemingly all-female crowd, and when everyone had been served and seated, Kame added up the totals.

“The winner is…” Kame said dramatically, every eye in the restaurant on him. “Nakamaru-kun!”

“EHHHHHHHH?!” Jin screeched, grabbing the paper from Kame (entitled ‘Nakame > Akame’) and holding it several different ways as though it would make the numbers change. Kame put on a smug face, but inwardly he cringed; Koki would not be happy with this outcome.

“May I collect my prize now?” Maru asked shyly, digging the toe of his shoe into the floor with his hands clasped behind his back as he raised his eyes to Kame.

Kame barely heard Jin throw down his visor and stomp to the back of the store, muttering, “I don’t want to watch this shit.”

“Follow through,” Maru mouthed, flicking his eyes briefly towards the small strip of wall next to the fry station.

Kame nodded to himself and took a deep breath. He reached Maru in two strides and shoved him up against the wall, his hand behind Maru’s head to cushion the impact. Hesitating, he focused on Maru’s large nose that was right next to his, breathing quickly as he felt Maru’s heart pounding against his chest. “I don’t want Koki-kun to kill me,” he whispered.

“He won’t,” replied Maru. “He’s very gentle.”

The next thing Kame knew, Maru’s thick lips were on his, kissing him soulfully as they wrapped their arms around each other, pulling them closer together. Kame felt a slip of tongue and tilted his head to deepen the kiss, lost in the sensations of Maru and the scent they both shared.

When he pulled away, he looked down at Maru’s glistening lips before returning to his eyes. “Congratulations,” he said politely.

“Damn, kid, you really have the hang of this,” Ueda’s voice broke through Kame’s reverie; still holding onto Maru, he turned to face Ueda as the latter hopped over the counter, hair perfect but cheeks very flushed. Ueda leaned his head between them and smirked at Kame. “Let me know when you’re ready to play with the big dogs, ne?”

Tsuyoshi stepped forward and folded his arms disapprovingly. “You should wash out the remainders of your boyfriend before you get in someone’s face like that,” he told Ueda in a bored voice.

“He’s not my boyfriend,” Ueda sang carelessly, gliding past Tsuyoshi to return to the grill. “But speaking of boyfriends, when is Koichi-san expected back?”

Tsuyoshi closed his eyes and exhaled forcibly. “Don’t you have something to… clean?”

“Kamenashi!” Koki’s voice boomed over the intercom. “It’s downtime.”

Maru winked and softly pushed Kame away. “He’s like a kitten, really.”

“Akanishi!” Ueda yelled as Kame reluctantly walked towards the drive-thru hole. “The dining room is a disaster! Get off your lazy ass and clean it.”

On his way back, Kame caught sight of Jin in Yamapi’s arms, pouting pitifully as Yamapi rocked him and whispered what looked like soothing things. Yamapi noticed Kame and quickly waved him away, using the same hand to stroke Jin’s hair as a distraction.

“He doesn’t like me,” Jin was mumbling sadly, clutching onto Yamapi’s shirt. “Am I not pretty anymore? Ryo-chan says I’m fat.”

“You are kind of fat,” Yamapi admitted, pressing a kiss to Jin’s forehead. “But your fat is beautiful.”

“Thanks.” Jin sniffled. “Pi-chan?”

“Yeah?”

“Make me forget him.”

The two of them conveniently left Kame’s peripheral just as Yamapi cupped Jin’s chin and lifted it up to capture his lips. Kame reached the drive-thru hole, which was unnaturally dark and entirely empty. Creeping cautiously around the small room, his eyes scanned over the register and Koki’s cell phone, lifting his eyes to the window just in time to see a shadow moving behind him in the reflection.

Kame shrieked as something was plopped on his head.

“Calm down,” said Koki, fastening the headset snugly. “Tsuyoshi-kun wanted me to train you on drive-thru while we’re slow.”

“The lights…” Kame trailed off, his eyes focusing on Koki and finding no trace of insanity.

“Attract bugs.” Koki shrugged. “Besides, I look better in the dark.”

Kame frowned. He was about to refute that statement, but the bell sounded and he looked helplessly at Koki, who gestured for him to answer it and supervised as he took the order and cashed out the customer.

“That wasn’t so hard, was it?”

His heart still pounding in his chest, he leaned against the open window and took a deep breath. “You scared me. I thought you were going to pound me for kissing Nakamaru-kun.”

Koki laughed out loud, slouching in the doorway. “Why does everybody think we are together like that? Yuichi is my…” He paused, looking towards the ceiling in thought. “Yuichi is Yuichi. That’s all there is to it. Ooh, here comes a car full of girls.” His face lit up. “I’ve never been able to pair sell anything, but I bet I could with you. You’re really good at it.”

Kame felt himself blushing as the bell went off again. He used his softest girly voice to take their order and hissed at Koki, “Stand behind me.”

There wasn’t much space in the little room, barely enough for two people side-by-side, but Koki sat on a pile of boxes and wrapped his legs around Kame’s waist, pulling him back as the car drove around.

“Kawaii!” the driver exclaimed, motioning excitedly to her friends.

“Please be kind to me,” said Kame shyly. “This is my first night. Don’t worry, though, my strong, attractive trainer will make sure your visit is pleasurable. ”

Koki chuckled embarrassedly into Kame’s hair as Kame repeated their order. “It’s warm tonight,” he added. “Maybe the pretty girls would like some ice cream to go with their meals?”

“Oh, I don’t know. We’re not that hungry…”

Kame nudged Koki with his shoulder. When nothing happened, he reached back and grabbed one of Koki’s hands, splaying it on his chest. Koki got the point and rubbed him up, shaking with laughter as he buried his face in Kame’s back to keep from being heard. Kame tossed his head back and exhaled forcibly, letting an unintended moan escape when Koki’s fingers pinched his nipples through his shirt.

“I want a hot fudge sundae,” one of the girls said.

“Four, then?” Kame prodded, blinking to focus his eyes through the haze.

A girl with too much makeup hung out of the backseat window and eyed Kame suspiciously. “We’ll get four hot fudge sundaes if he puts his hand down your pants.”

“Kuriko!” another girl hissed. “Don’t make them do something like that just to make a sale. That’s prostitution!”

“It’s only prostitution if we profit,” Kame pointed out. “And besides, I so want him to.”

“Really?” Koki said bewilderedly, tilting his head enough to look at Kame.

Kame lowered his eyes and raised them bashfully. “Yeah, I mean, you know, if you want to.”

“Eeeee!” the girls squealed.

“Are you sure?” asked Koki.

Nodding, Kame leaned back and brushed their lips together, ignoring the squeals of the girls as he pushed himself against Koki, lacing his fingers through one of his hands and bringing it down past the window ledge, figuring Koki would stop at his waist and they would pretend from there.

But Koki didn’t stop, nor did Kame make any effort to stop him as Koki’s hand slipped past the waistband of Kame’s pants and rubbed against his cock. Kame instinctively arched up into the touch, hardening almost immediately and deepening their kiss considerably as Koki curled his fingers around him.

“Koki, what is taking so damn long -”

Koki snatched his hand back like it had caught fire and shoved Kame away from him, nearly sending him crashing into the register as Maru appeared in the doorway.

Maru raised an eyebrow at the incriminating scene before him and cleared his throat uncomfortably.

“You can add those sundaes now,” the girl named Kuriko said with wide eyes, handing the driver some money. “They’re on me.”

Kame forced a smile as he changed their order and accepted the money. When he turned around to give them their change, they were gone. He handed it to Maru instead, shaking his head for lack of anything to say, and cocked his head as Maru nodded and disappeared without a word or a glance at Koki.

Koki was closely examining the speed of service poster on the wall when Kame spun around to face him. “What the fuck was that?”

“What the fuck was what?” Koki replied, his face pale. “You told me to do it.”

“Not _that_ ,” said Kame dismissingly. “ _That_. With Nakamaru.”

Koki shrugged. “I don’t know anymore.”

Kame sighed exasperatedly and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I think I need a break.” Without waiting for Koki’s response, he flung the headset at him and fled to the break room.

Yamapi was sleeping on the table with his ass in the air, presumably on lunch judging by the fact that he had been halfway through eating the triple-cheeseburger that was about to fall out of his hand. Kame saved it just before it fell on the floor, wrapped it up for him, and grabbed one of the heavy McJohnny’s drive-thru coats to cover him with. Yamapi sighed gratefully in his sleep and curled up, reaching for Kame and latching onto him before he could get away.

“Yamashita-kun,” Kame said quietly, poking him in the forehead. “Yamashita-kun, let me go please.”

Yamapi squeezed Kame around the waist, made a face, and mumbled, “Jin-chan ja _nai_.” Frowning, he released Kame and snuggled with himself.

“You like Jin?” Kame asked carefully.

A stupid grin formed on Yamapi’s face and he nodded, slowly opening his eyes and focusing on Kame. “I like everyone, but I like Jin-chan the most. He’s the only one I’d go ass-to-mouth for.”

Kame couldn’t help but smile at him. “That’s cute.”

Yamapi giggled and looked around, pausing when he reached Kame’s lower half. “Ooh, who got you all worked up?”

Kame quickly sat down and hunched over, lighting his cigarette for something to do. “Some girls in the drive-thru wanted Koki to get to third base.”

“He fingered you in the drive-thru?!” Yamapi screamed in disbelief, almost falling off of the table as he shifted his balance. “That _pimp_. I didn’t think he had it in him.”

“No!” cried Kame.

“He blew you?”

“ _No_. He just stuck his hand down my pants.”

“Pfft,” said Yamapi, blowing his bangs out of his eyes in the process. “That’s not third base. That’s shortstop. You know, between second and third base.”

Kame nodded understandingly. He used to play baseball in high school.

“You scared me,” said Yamapi, clutching his chest as he rolled over and really did fall off the table. Unconcerned, he simply hoisted himself back up and dusted off his pants.

Kame held out his pack of cigarettes. “Want one?”

“Nah,” said Yamapi, waving his hand and using his sing-song voice. “The only thing I smoke is pole!”

Kame choked on his drag. “What?”

Yamapi laughed hysterically, collapsing into the plastic chair and hugging his knees to his chest. “I love that joke. Jin-chan thought it up.”

“It’s very funny,” Kame humored him, chuckling despite himself.

Yamapi tripped over himself as he crossed the room and knelt in front of Kame. “I have ten minutes left. Do you want some head?”

“Some what?” Kame choked again and decided that it was not in his best interest to smoke right now.

Grinning, Yamapi slid his hands up Kame’s thighs, gently pushing them apart and scooting forward to unfasten the button of Kame’s pants. “Just let me.”

“O-kay.” Kame kept his eyes on Yamapi’s determined face as he lowered the zipper and exposed Kame’s length. He inhaled sharply at the instant contact of Yamapi’s hot mouth around him, flicking his tongue along the underside as he wasted no time sucking him in and out.

Koyama had not been kidding. Kame fisted his mouth to keep from making noises that would certainly attract the attention of everyone in the restaurant as Yamapi expertly used his lips to make an air-tight suction and quickened his pace, making Kame harder and harder until he tangled his fingers in Yamapi’s hair and rolled his hips upwards to meet Yamapi’s rhythm, groaning into his knuckles as the tension pooled together inside of him.

The door flung open and Jin stood gaping, his mouth halfway open and crooked like he had been about to say something but the words had left him upon seeing Yamapi’s head bobbing up and down in Kame’s lap. Kame caught his eye, feeling the rage and jealousy surge through him, and couldn’t hold back anymore, throwing his head back and yanking hard on Yamapi’s hair as he gasped and came.

Yamapi swallowed and wiped his mouth, tucking Kame back into his pants and spotting the rest of his lunch on the next table. “Ooh, food!” He snatched it and stuffed the last half of the sandwich into his mouth. “Hi, Jin-chan,” he said through the large bite. “Kazuya tastes good.”

Jin spun on his heel and slammed the door behind him.

“Thanks,” Kame said breathlessly, lounging back in his chair as he mustered up the energy to move. “Is it okay to just let him go like that?”

Yamapi shrugged. “He’ll get over it. He always does.”

The door cracked open again and Maru’s nose peeked in, followed by the rest of him. “It smells like sex in here,” he commented, reaching for the Incriminating-Scent-Be-Gone spray and attacking the air with it ninja-style. “Tsuyoshi-san is looking for you, Kamenashi. Oh, and if Yamapi can keep his mouth shut, which is close to impossible unless there’s a dick in it -” Yamapi nodded agreeably as Maru pulled something out of his pocket and handed it to Kame “- this is for you.”

Kame counted the bills. “What is this for?”

“Those girls tipped,” Maru explained. “ _Big_.”

Frowning, Kame handed it back. “Give it to Koki. It’s his, not mine.”

Maru stared at the ‘Customer Service is Srs Bsns’ sign as though he’d never seen anything so interesting. “You give it to him. Please?” He presented the money to Kame with both hands, bowing low. “Onegai shimasu.”

“What’s the deal with you two, anyway?” Kame asked irritably. “Ueda and Nishikido may lie to everyone about their obvious relationship, but at least they know how they feel about each other.”

“I agree with that comment,” Yamapi spoke up.

“I _resent_ that comment,” said Maru. “How dare you compare us to RyoDa. I would _never_ talk to Koki the way Ryo talks to Tatsuya.” He narrowed his eyes at Kame. “Tsuyoshi-san is looking for you,” he said again before taking his leave.

Kame sighed and heaved himself out of the chair. Yamapi waved happily and promptly fell back asleep. Whistling, he found Tsuyoshi locking up in the dining room.

“Good, there you are,” Tsuyoshi said tiredly, tossing him a rag. “You and Akanishi are closing frontline, which means you’ll probably be cleaning by yourself.” He rubbed his eyes. “If you have any questions, I’ll be in the office, so ask someone else.”

Jin was already taking over the one booth that wasn’t in front of a window or on the security camera, propping his feet up on the table and chain smoking. He gave Kame a one-finger salute. “When you’re ready to take out the trash, grab someone who is not me to go with you. McJohnny’s regulations require at least two persons outside the building after dark.”

“Whatever,” said Kame absently; if Jin was going to be a douche to him, he was going to be one right back.

They both glanced up as a loud bang signified someone entering the building, someone who obviously had keys since Tsuyoshi had just locked the doors. Kame was momentarily amused at the eyesore that was Domoto Koichi in street clothes, looking considerably shorter in a Hawaiian-print shirt and bright orange pants that were way too big for him. His bangs were pulled straight up with a rubber band, looking like a fountain of copper hair shooting out of the top of his head, and his wire-rimmed glasses were too big for his face and kept falling down his nose.

“‘Sup, Kou _chan_ ,” Jin said pointedly, blowing smoke in Koichi’s general direction and laughing to himself when Koichi didn’t even acknowledge him. “It’s like he’s a zombie at these times,” he told Kame. “One time Yamapi followed him all the way back to the office with his dick hanging out and he didn’t bat an eye.” He cracked up. “It was just flopping around like a damn swinging pendulum. Hilarious.”

“That’s funny,” Kame said tonelessly as he got to work cleaning up. Jin told him stupid stories about things that had happened over the years and really weren’t that interesting as Kame wiped tables, cleaned the bathrooms, and bagged up the trash, helpfully keeping his feet off of the floor when Kame swept and mopped.

“Oi, Kazuya,” Jin called out as Kame started to head back to the counter.

“Kamenashi is fine,” said Kame warningly.

“Kazuya,” Jin repeated. “I’ll help you take out the trash.”

Kame eyed him warily. “Why?”

Jin shrugged. “I’m bored. Come on, let’s go.”

‘Helping’ meant that Jin opened the back door and led Kame out to the dumpster, not bothering to carry any of the seven overfilled bags of trash from the dining room and backline combined. Kame lost his balance more than a few times and almost sent everything crashing to the blacktop, but luckily Jin was there to grab him by the waist and keep him upright, continuing to not take any of the bags.

Jin’s hold didn’t waver even after Kame heaved all of the bags into the dumpster by himself; in fact, one of his hands were inching past Kame’s waistline and squeezing the sharp angle of his hip. “Let’s fool around, Kazuya.”

“Let’s not,” said Kame shortly. “And it’s _Kamenashi_ , thanks.”

“Why don’t you like me?” Jin whined, leaning against the wall behind the dumpster and pulling Kame flush against him, both hands now touching skin. “You’ve messed around with everyone else but me.”

“There are no customers out here, Akanishi,” said Kame, folding his arms but otherwise unmoving.

“There were no customers in the break room, either,” Jin pointed out.

Kame laughed mockingly. “If you want to blow me, go right ahead.”

Jin’s hands slipped around to the back and forcefully grabbed Kame’s bare ass, smashing their groins together. “I will win you,” he said again, ghosting Kame’s face with his own.

Kame’s eyebrows rose as he was met with something rock-hard and couldn’t keep himself from reacting. “Akanishi.”

“Don’t try to stop me,” breathed Jin, his lips descending to the dip of Kame’s neck. “You want it too, I can feel it. Don’t deny your body the Jin it needs.”

Rolling his eyes, Kame pushed Jin into the wall and snuck out from his grasp while he was momentarily dazed. “If you’re going to seduce me, at least make an effort and don’t do it where it reeks of garbage.”

Jin considered this for exactly three seconds before grabbing Kame by his arm and dragging him into the same group of trees where Koyama had brought him earlier. Kame struggled to speak as Jin threw him to the ground and crawled on top of him, fusing their bodies together and sucking his throat while grinding his lower half against Kame’s.

“You know -” Kame gasped, Jin’s hands sliding under his shirt and teasing his nipples into peaks. “- Koki can see us from here.”

“Let the perv watch,” Jin said huskily, pushing Kame’s shirt up to his shoulders in order to lick his chest directly. “Besides, it’ll start getting busy here shortly. Friday night bar rush.”

“Doesn’t that mean we should go help?” Kame squirmed when Jin’s hand found its way into his pants, wrapping around his erection and stroking slow enough to be torture. “Faster, Jin.”

Jin chuckled into Kame’s skin, looking up into his eyes as he flicked his tongue against the tiny nub, smirking at Kame’s escaped moan. “I’ll go faster if you let me kiss you.”

“Whatever,” said Kame, yanking Jin up with his hair and crushing their mouths together, immediately meshing his tongue with Jin’s as Jin kissed back strongly, tightening his hand around Kame and upping his speed a skosh. Kame decided that Jin was an amazing kisser and allowed himself to enjoy it, thrusting up into Jin’s touch and whimpering softly against Jin’s lips as Jin brought him closer and closer to release.

“Kazuya,” Jin whispered, sucking on Kame’s tongue suggestively. “I’ll go down on you if you let me fuck you.”

“Since when did this become a negotiation?” Kame replied, his hands contradicting his words by pushing down on Jin’s shoulders. “If anyone’s getting fucked here, it’s you. I don’t uke to anyone, especially lazy bastards like you.”

“Suck me off and you’ve got a deal,” Jin whispered, retracting his hand from Kame’s arousal and rolling over onto his back expectantly. He closed his eyes and squeezed himself through his pants, sighing contently. “I’ve thought of nothing else all night except your pretty mouth around my cock.”

“Shut _up_ ,” said Kame, kneeling between Jin’s legs and smacking his hand away. “If I’m going to do this, I don’t want to have to listen to your cheesy porn-sounding bullshit in the process.”

Before Jin could respond, Kame made quick work of his pants and managed to take Jin’s flesh into his mouth without looking at it. Jin groaned loudly, bucking his hips upwards, but Kame was rather experienced at this and knew how to keep his lips tight around a cock to keep it from moving. Jin whined and stilled, balling his fists on either side of him because he probably thought – and rightfully so – Kame would not tolerate his hair messed up.

“Kazuya, _please_ ,” Jin begged, looking down at him with his puppy-dog eyes. “I’ve only ever let one other person top me. That should tell you how bad I want this.”

Kame slurped Jin all the way into his mouth and established a rhythm, but only because he was tired of hearing Jin’s voice. He also highly doubted the validity of Jin’s first statement after tugging down his pants and feeling Jin’s legs automatically curl around him, displaying his ass for Kame’s taking.

Jin was surprisingly quieter the more aroused he got, reducing to low wheezes as Kame lifted off and tongued the tip. “Lube?”

“Moch~” said Jin with no depth in his voice, slapping his hand against the ground over and over until he felt his pants and pulled a tube from the back pocket.

“Who brings lube to work?” Kame wondered out loud, then remembered exactly where he worked. McJohnny’s probably endorsed Astro-Glide. “Never mind, give it.”

“ _Suck_ it,” Jin retorted, flinging the tube in Kame’s general direction and moaning voicelessly as Kame actually complied. “God _damn_ , Kazuya, you’re better than Pi.”

His noises got more rushed and breathless as Kame prepped him roughly, his legs spreading wide like a whore when Kame found his prostate and jabbed his fingers against it, Jin’s cock hitting the back of his throat as he sped things up in an attempt to get this part over with. Jin’s body started to spasm, his mouth gaping open and his eyes squeezed shut, a series of grunts emitting from his lungs before a long, continuous moan sounded and a stream of bitter warmth shot into Kame’s mouth.

Kame immediately pushed himself up and spat to the side, cringing as the night breeze caused the fount to come right back to smack him in the face. He paused as the sight of Jin in a post-orgasmic flush, knees shakily lifting to his chest, aroused him even more. “I’m going to fuck you into the ground,” he said heatedly.

“God, I hope so,” Jin replied weakly, stretching his neck to lick his mess off of Kame’s cheek.

Kame quickly coated his length with the rest of the lube and wasted no time pushing inside that tight heat, groaning in relief when he was in all the way. Jin’s heels dug into Kame’s ass and urged him to move, one hand reaching up to softly brush his hair out of his eyes as Kame blinked up to look at him.

Jin smiled and cupped Kame’s jaw, leaning up and puckering his lips for a kiss. Kame didn’t think twice before diving in, Jin’s tongue slipping against his as his balls slapped against Jin’s ass, which was clenching around him with every thrust. Jin cried out into his mouth when Kame hit his spot and kept going, faster and deeper, lowering his face into Jin’s neck and biting down as his release approached.

“Kazuya,” Jin croaked. “Kazuya, touch me, please.”

Kame was surprised to discover Jin erect again, but it only fazed him for a second as he wrapped his fingers around the hard flesh and pumped him determinedly, feeling Jin’s inner walls get even tighter as he breathed heavily from his mouth and soft moans slipped through his lips. It became almost suffocating as Jin’s cock twitched in his hand, spurting out over Kame’s fingers at the same time Kame exploded inside Jin.

Shaking the substance off of his hand, Kame looked around for something to wipe it on while Jin laughed and pulled his pants back on. He tossed Kame a rag that had been stuffed into his pocket and winked. “McJohnny’s suggests always keeping a sanitized rag on your person in case of sudden spills.”

Kame snorted. “We should get back to work.”

“Wait,” said Jin, reaching out for Kame. “You have leaves in your hair.” He kissed him under the pretense of removing the debris, and Kame let him.

By the time they made it back inside, it was time for Jin to clock out. “You know you want to stay,” Ueda said sweetly, wrapping no less than ten burgers in ten seconds and sending them up for Koki to bag. “Dammit, Yamashita, stop dragging ass.”

“Get me some fucking help then,” Yamapi snapped, racing back and forth between the fryer and the grill, stocking meat for Ueda and dropping a multitude of fryer items. Kame was amazed that he was pressing the right buttons with as stressed as he was. “We’re going to be here until six a.m. if it keeps on like this.”

“ _Please_ ,” Ueda pleaded to Jin, bowing his head in a way that shocked both Kame and Maru. “Just until the drive-thru dies down.”

“I have to be back here at eleven,” Jin protested. “Make Tsuyoshi-san come up here.”

“Then we really will be here until six,” Koki griped, flinging bags at Maru’s station without making eye contact with him. “We haven’t had a chance to clean anything because _someone_ decided to fuck in the bushes.” He pushed the button on his headset and finished taking an order on the front register. “And some genius had a bright idea to close the hole early. Please drive around to the second window, thanks.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Ueda spat. “It was slow until like twenty minutes ago.”

“What the _shit_ , Jin,” Yamapi said angrily, dropping a basket of fries hard enough that a small splash of grease popped up and hit his hand. “Itai!”

Kame quickly washed his hands and grabbed the headset from Koki. “Go smoke or something,” he said, taking over and shoving Koki out into the dining room.

Ueda whistled. “This kid has management written all over him.”

Maru smiled gratefully at Kame as the cars started moving through more smoothly, waving away Koki when he came back and motioning for him to cover Yamapi. Jin took Yamapi back to the sink area and ran cold water over his burn, kissing him everywhere but where it hurt and managing to wash dishes at the same time.

“Akanishi’s only productive after he gets off,” Maru hissed, presumably noticing Kame’s impressed expression. “We starting taking turns doing the honors in the beginning, but then it got to be a big hassle and there was a mix-up in scheduling…”

By the time the drive-thru was cleared, it was twenty minutes to closing and Jin was still there, helping Yamapi and Ueda clean the grill area while Kame served the last-minute stragglers and Koki and Maru were entirely not there.

“I am out of here like Pi at a health food place,” Jin said, giggling at his joke as he clocked out.

“Lies!” Yamapi yelled, pointing accusingly at Jin. “Food is food.”

Jin smirked. “Even sprouts?”

Yamapi made a face. “As long as I don’t have to look at them.”

Laughing hysterically, Jin hopped over the counter and whispered very loudly to Kame, “He thinks sprouts look like -”

“Not funny, Akanishi,” Ueda roared over the intercom. “Thanks for staying late, now get the hell out and if you call in tomorrow, I will drive to your house, beat down your door, drag your ass out of bed by your ugly hair and -”

“Tat-chan!” Jin exclaimed, gasping in fake shock. “Not everybody needs to know our dirty little secrets.”

Yamapi stumbled over to Jin and put an arm around his shoulder. “Sorry to break it to you, babe, but everyone knows all of your dirty little secrets.” Suddenly he pointed at Kame, eyes big. “Including that one!”

Ueda sighed and shook his head disappointedly at Kame. “You should have known better than to go outside with him, Kamenashi. Now you’ll have a reputation.”

Kame shrugged as he stocked up the drive-thru area, looking coyly over his shoulder as he said, “It’s not like I was uke.”

Two heads swiveled towards Jin. “Bye-bye!” Jin squeaked, racing for the door and stopping dead as he glanced towards the end of the dining room and clutched his left man-boob. “Oh, my heart.”

Yamapi jumped over the counter, followed by Kame, who ran straight into both of them and barely caught the end of what had most likely been very non-friendly romantic kiss between Koki and Maru.

“Aw,” Akamapi chorused.

Ueda knocked them all over and folded his arms disapprovingly. “No mushy shit on the clock. If you’re going to fight and fuck, fine, but don’t make me nauseous.”

Maru buried his face in his hands as Koki busied himself with a cigarette, both a bright shade of pink.

“Aw, come on, Tat-chan,” Jin said, smiling happily as Yamapi snuggled behind him. “You mean to say you don’t act like that with Ryo when you’re alone?”

“Are you kidding?” Ueda strode back to the counter. “He’s lucky I don’t kill him.”

“You know,” said Kame conversationally, as though they were discussing the weather or possibly Hiraoka Yuta, “Nishikido-kun is kind of hot. If he’s not tied down, maybe I will -”

Kame found himself up against the wall with Ueda in his face, shooting daggers from his eyes. “If you so much as _look_ at him and there’s not a pair sell involved, I will shove your dick in the tomato slicer and -”

“I rest my case,” said Jin.

Ueda let go of Kame and calmly walked away, pulling out his cell phone and pushing number two on his speed dial.

“Can I come over tonight?” Yamapi asked softly, pressing his lips to the top of Jin’s spine.

“Pi- _chan_ ,” said Jin hesitantly. “I have to work tomorrow.”

“Call in.”

“I can’t. Tat-chan will hurt me.”

“I won’t wake you up,” Yamapi insisted. “I just want to sleep with you. I’ll sneak into your house all ninja-like and creep into your bed. I have to be at my other job at nine anyway.”

Jin sighed. “Okay. You know where the spare key is.”

Kame grew bored and joined Koki and Maru at their table, lighting up a smoke and staring out the window. “So you two are together now?”

Koki burst out laughing and Maru snorted. “Do you believe this guy?” Koki said a little too forcefully. “We only did that because we knew your gullible asses were coming.”

“Yeah,” added Maru. “Pervs.”

Kame shook his head and looked out the window, peering when he saw somebody standing by the door. “Isn’t that… Nishikido?”

“LET ME IN, YOU COCKSTAINS,” Ryo mouthed.

“What’s a cockstain?” Pi whispered to Jin. “That sounds kinky. You want to do a cockstain, Jin-chan?”

Jin responded to Ryo with a series of hand gestures which included the command to steal third and a few bars of para para. Ryo sharply dragged his finger from one side of his throat to the other, glaring so hard at Jin that he stopped trying to sign ‘eat me’ in finger spelling and flailed to the door.

Ryo immediately shoved him aside and stormed into the building, paying no attention to any of them. “What the shit, Tatsuya, you call me six times and hang up like a fucking thirteen-year-old _girl_. I have caller ID, you imbecile. If you’re not dead, seriously injured, or having a hair emergency, I’m going to kill you.”

“I’m coming over tonight!” Ueda yelled across the store. “And I’m not sneaking in the goddamn window again, so you best wait by the door so I don’t wake up your mom.”

“Whatever,” said Ryo, looking only slightly relieved. “Bring food.”

“Pay for it, asshole. I don’t work twelve hour shifts to feed your skinny ass.”

“Who are you calling skinny?” Ryo shot back. “Your wrist is thinner than my dick.”

Yamapi made a face. “I’m going to have nightmares now. Jin-chan, hold me.”

“Oh, please,” Ueda called out, his voice getting louder as he approached Ryo. “My pinky finger is bigger than your dick. I don’t know how you manage to -”

“DAME!” Koki screamed, making an ‘X’ with his arms. “I do not want to know this!”

“I do,” said Jin, pulling over a chair and sitting down backwards. “Carry on.”

“You wish,” said Ryo, glaring at Jin and finally noticing Kame standing behind him. Ryo dropjawed and pointed straight at him. “You had sex! Who did you have sex with?”

“Ueda,” Kame answered nonchalantly.

This time he was flung to the floor, dodging badly-thrown punches as Ryo more or less wailed on him. “I will fucking _kill_ you, you scrawny fuck. You don’t have shit on me, bitch. Keep your greasy paws off of my Tatsuya or -”

“ _Your_ Tatsuya,” Ueda repeated, going completely still and looking like he had just seen a fairy.

“Yeah,” said Ryo breathlessly, abandoning Kame and standing up to face Ueda, his expression hard. “ _My. Fucking. Tatsuya_.”

Ueda started walking towards him, slowly at first but picking up momentum. When he reached Ryo, he didn’t pause or alter his speed, just grabbed him by the hair and dragged him to the girls’ bathroom. The door slammed behind them, a series of bangs following.

Yamapi knelt next to Jin’s chair and leaned against him. “RyoDa have the strongest undisappearing bond I have ever seen. I’m so jealous.”

Kame poked Yamapi. “Let’s finish up so we can all go home.”

“Let me say good-bye to Jin-chan,” said Yamapi, initiating his super awesome handshake with Jin that ended with Jin falling backwards into a booth and Yamapi falling on his mouth.

Koki and Maru headed back with Kame, taking turns showing Kame the proper grill closing procedures. Yamapi stumbled in sadly a few moments later, heading straight to the sink area. When Ueda didn’t return by two-thirty, Kame was starting to get worried.

“Maybe we should get Tsuyoshi-san,” he said to Koki as they gave the place a final sweep. “We’re just about done, and didn’t you have plans?”

Koki sideglanced at Maru putting back together the fry hopper and cleared his throat. “They, um, changed. We’re just going home and going to sleep. Not together,” he added quickly.

Kame patted his shoulder. “It’s okay. Making it real doesn’t make it any less.”

At those words, Maru lifted his head and stared at Koki. “He’s right, you know.”

Kame hung his head. “If you two start making out, I’m going home.”

“Kame-chan,” Yamapi sang, jogging over to Kame and resting his chin on his shoulder. “I’m all done. May I go now? I miss Jin-chan.”

“I’m not in charge,” Kame said edgily. “Am I?”

“Well, out of the four of us, I have seniority,” said Yamapi logically. “And I want to go home, which means that by default you’re in charge. Because I said so.”

“That doesn’t make any sense,” said Kame. “I’m going to go get Tsuyoshi-san.”

“Wait!” three voices stopped him. “Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Maru added cautiously. “Nobody’s seen what Koichi-san and Tsuyoshi-san do in there after close.”

“Yeah,” agreed Yamapi. “What if they’re, like, naked and chanting some weird Kansai voodoo ritual and you happen to walk in at the wrong moment and – POOF! You’re bald and pregnant.”

“He had sex with Jin, not you,” Koki said, patting Yamapi’s head. “Where do you come up with this shit?”

Yamapi held a finger to his forehead. “You would not _believe_ the depths of knowledge that are swimming around in here.”

“I’m sure it’s nothing like that,” said Kame. “Tsuyoshi-san is new at, um, assistant-managing, so Koichi-san is probably just helping him do paperwork and… stuff. You said yourself, it takes Ueda-kun until the morning to do it himself.”

“Because he keeps getting distracted,” said Koki. “Like now.”

Maru nodded. “And we can’t leave until they’re done.”

“I’m going,” said Kame decidedly, walking towards the supply area before anyone could stop him. He heard voices as he approached the office, and once he turned the last corner he felt immediately at ease; the office door was wide open and Koichi and Tsuyoshi were both fully dressed, Koichi trying to pin something to Tsuyoshi’s shirt.

“Come on, Tsuyo,” Koichi was saying, smiling in a way Kame hadn’t yet seen.

“Kouchan,” said Tsuyoshi seriously. “I am not wearing a name tag that says ‘Ass Man’.”

“That’s how it’s abbreviated in English!” Koichi insisted.

“Did Akanishi tell you that?” asked Tsuyoshi. “Maybe you should make _him_ wear it.”

Koichi laughed and hopped on the counter of the small office, reaching over to play with Tsuyoshi’s hair as the latter went back to pouring over multiple binders. “I should go get the tills,” Tsuyoshi said absently, making no effort to move as Koichi’s fingers ran through his hair.

“Yes, you should,” said Koichi pointedly. “They’ve sent the new kid back here to fetch you.”

Kame gulped as they both turned to look at him. “Eto… Tsuyoshi-san, we’re almost done. Nakamaru-kun is mopping now.”

Koichi pulled Tsuyoshi back by his hair and looked down at him. “Your crew wants to go home, Tsuyo-chan. Come on, let’s go see how much money we made tonight.”

“Ooh,” said Tsuyoshi in fake excitement. “If we broke ten thousand, will you buy me a pony?”

Kame followed the Domotos back to the frontline and sat in the dining room with Nakanakapi while Tsuyoshi pulled the drawers and ran the reports. Yamapi curled up in Kame’s lap while Koki and Maru entertained him with some off-color comedy skits.

“Ueda!” Tsuyoshi yelled from the counter a half hour later.

Ueda fell unceremoniously out of the girls’ bathroom, tugging up his pants with both pigtails still in tact. “Hai!” he replied, his voice a bit hoarse.

“ _Please_ tell me you switched over the system at midnight,” Tsuyoshi’s wavering voice sailed through the otherwise silent building.

“… Shit,” Ueda said slowly, his eyes wide as he darted to the front.

Koki headdesked. “We are going to be here _all night_.”

Ryo strutted out of the bathroom, his hair sticking up in seventeen different directions. “Somebody give me a cigarette,” he ordered.

Kame held one out for him as Ryo pulled up a chair and asked, “Where’d Akanishi go?”

“Home,” said Yamapi sleepily. “I was supposed to go, but now I can’t. Sad, sad, sad. At this rate, I’m going to have to go straight from here to my other job. Please let me sleep.”

Koki started snoring from where his head had landed on the table. Maru patted him on the head and shrugged, leaving his arm lingering on Koki’s back. “It could be worse.”

“ _How_ ,” whined Yamapi.

“Yamashita, go,” said Ueda, poking his head around the corner. “Seriously, go before I change my mind.”

Yamapi wasted no time flying out the door after running into it twice while attempting to unlock it from the inside.

“He didn’t clock out,” Kame noted.

“Doesn’t matter,” said Ryo. “Since Tatsuya didn’t switch over, they have to manually redo all of that shit now.”

“I don’t think it’s Tatsuya’s fault,” said Maru quietly. “He wasn’t supposed to close tonight.”

“I agree,” said Ryo with a yawn.

“Is there anything we can do to help?” asked Kame.

“Stay out of their way,” replied Ryo. “Nothing can really be done to fix it until Monday morning, when Doko will most likely get his ass chewed by Corporate, but if they get the numbers now he’ll, you know, still have a job. And an assistant manager, since it _was_ technically Dots’ responsibility.” He paused. “So who did you have sex with? I know it wasn’t Tatsuya, because he just spent the past two hours proving it to me.”

“Jin,” Koki answered for him.

Ryo made a face. “Out of everyone… I’d rather sleep with Ohno than Akanishi, and Ohno looks like he fell from the ugly tree.”

“I heard that!” Ueda screamed. “Don’t make me kick his ass and make him even uglier!”

“Is that Nishikido again?” Kame heard Tsuyoshi ask. “What the hell is he doing here?”

Ryo was saved by the work phone ringing. Koichi threw up his hands and said, “I’m not here,” Tsuyoshi glared at the pile of receipts he was sorting through and ignored it, and Ueda lifted his head from the counter at the noise, looking pained.

“Oh fine,” said Maru bitterly. “I’ll get it.”

Kame lit another cigarette as Maru went to answer the phone. “Hold on,” Maru said into the receiver before covering it and turning to Tsuyoshi. “It’s obviously a manager call. Who else calls at three-thirty in the morning? I think it’s Ohno-kun because he started laughing as soon as I picked up, making fun of the fact that we’re all still here.”

Ueda rolled over onto his back and snatched the phone from Maru. “If you are calling in, so help me God, I will – what? Nino has it too?”

“Motherfucker,” growled Tsuyoshi. “I am not staying here all morning.”

“I’ll start at four,” Ryo offered, standing up to leave. “Let me just go home and shower.”

Tsuyoshi shook his head. “No, you’ve been up all night. They’ll be fine without Nino.”

“I want a doctor’s note,” Ueda spat into the phone. “And stay away from the rest of our employees. Seriously, Ohno, I will make you fuckers work, I don’t care if you’re scratching your balls the whole time. You can scratch your balls while you take orders.”

Koichi made a face. “Must you be so… visual?”

Tsuyoshi shrugged. “I’ve gotten used to it.” He turned to Ueda. “Not you, not me, but someone who is halfway competent has to be here in half an hour.”

Ueda’s face lit up as Ohno said something on the other end of the line. “You found your own replacement? I told you, Aiba-chan can’t run a shift by himself because he’s retar- who? No _fucking_ way. I haven’t seen that guy in… five years? He was such a fug kid… oh, _really_.”

Ryo’s head perked up at Ueda’s tone. “Who the fuck are you talking about?”

Ueda ignored him. “I’ll be watching for him. Yeah, we’re nowhere near done.” He cocked his head while Ohno yapped to him for a minute before grunting an agreement. “What about for Nino? Call who? Oh, _yeah_ , I need to yell at that maintenance douche anyway. He left me with three fryers on a Friday night… yeah, I know. I’m going to hang up now.” And he did, tossing the phone to Koichi. “Call in Tsubakki per Ohno. They’ll bitch but they’ll come in. And you will not _believe_ who’s coming in to open the store.”

“Gackt,” guessed Tsuyoshi dryly, counting a stack of money. “That would certainly make my night.”

Ueda rolled his eyes while Koichi disappeared with the phone. “Mine too,” they both muttered.

Kame stared at Ryo, and when nothing happened, he frowned. “What, you’re not going to go all crazy jealous?”

“We have a celebrity clause,” Ryo said simply.

“Fucking _Toma_ ,” Ueda went on. “Remember that kid? He had the weird face and bad hair and the deepest voice I’ve ever heard on a seventeen-year-old. He left after about a year to go to college but ended up dropping out and working at the McJohnny’s by the freeway. Apparently he’s still there and grade-A management material.”

“Yatta!” exclaimed Koki. “I went to high school with that guy. Ikuta Toma-kun. Good kid, bad hair.”

“ _Sucked_ at pair selling,” added Tsuyoshi. “He couldn’t flirt to save his life, but it was so funny to watch him try.”

There was a bang on the door and all seven heads swiveled to see a tall, lean figure with gorgeous red hair waving happily from the other side.

Ueda dropjawed and smacked Ryo when he did the same. “What the fuck are you looking at, asshole?”

Koki jogged over to let Toma in and greeted him like they were old friends. Toma approached the counter and surveyed first the mountain of paperwork, then Koichi, who had the decency to take down his hair before he returned. “You’re aging gracefully, Koichi-san.”

“Either help or start opening,” Tsuyoshi snapped without looking up while Koichi frowned sadly. “And you’re supposed to stay in the parking lot until your crew gets here.”

“You’re also supposed to be done an hour after close,” Toma shot back, leaning against the counter. “What do you need me to do?”

Tsuyoshi flashed him a grateful look and shoved a pile of papers towards him. “Thanks,” he muttered.

Another knock on the door signified someone else arriving; two someones, actually, but one was draped over the other’s shoulders completely conked out.

“No _way_!” cried Toma excitedly, running to let them in. “I get to work with Takki and Tsubasa today? I had no idea all of you guys still worked here.”

Kame leaned over to whisper to Maru. “You’d think that everyone lives within a five-hundred meter radius of this place or something.”

Maru chuckled and winked. “Nah, we all just fly here.”

The one carrying the other carefully put him down in a booth and glanced around at everyone. “Jesus, the whole damn company’s here. I thought Ueda-kun didn’t close last night?”

“Shut it, Imai!” Ueda yelled around the corner.

The other one – Takki, Kame presumed – popped open one eye and immediately cringed, covering his face with his mullet. “Ah, Ryo-chan’s backside is not what I want to see first thing in the morning.”

Toma snatched the schedule from Ueda and peered at Ryo. “Nishikido? Aren’t you scheduled for eleven?”

“I’ll be here, don’t you worry your pretty little head about it,” Ryo replied.

Ueda growled at Toma like it was Toma’s fault that he was so damn hot and hopped off the counter to point a finger in Takki’s sleepy face. “Takizawa! What the fuck happened to my fourth fryer? Akanishi turned it on last night and damn near burned the place down.”

Takki blinked at him. “You are entirely too loud. Didn’t he put grease in it?”

“Didn’t who put grease in it?” exclaimed Ueda. “It was empty when I got here at two.”

“I _told_ Aiba-chan to put grease in it,” said Takki tiredly. “I had to wait until after the lunch rush to clean it, so I couldn’t fill it before I left.”

“Aiba-chan has the mentality of a five-year-old,” said Ueda sternly. “He’s not going to go near anything that is hot and spitting.”

Takki shrugged. “Oh well. Now I won’t have to clean that one today.”

Ueda rubbed his temples and crawled back onto the counter. “I have a headache.”

“Got it!” Toma announced satisfactorily, thrusting a receipt into the air. “This is the last number.”

“Yo _ka_ tta,” Koichi said in relief, grabbing the deposit bags and hauling ass for the door. “I’ll take these to the bank on my way home. Let’s get out of here.”

Tsubasa triumphantly exited the bathroom and dragged Takki to the counter, clocking them in as Nakanakame gathered their things.

Tsuyoshi clapped Toma on the shoulder. “You’ve got Tsubakki until noon, Tegomass between six and eight – do _not_ let them go on break together or you won’t see them for three hours – Nishinishi at eleven, and Ueda-kun is scheduled at five but will probably come back around two. If you need to go before then, you can leave Akanishi and Nishikido in charge. Together, they make a halfway decent leader.” Ryo beamed as Tsuyoshi continued. “Kusano will be here around ten, but he really only has enough brain cells to clean the toilets, and Koyama will probably call around noon wanting to come in because he’s bored and hungry. If you have any problems, my phone will be conveniently dead and lost, so call someone else.”

“Call Ohno,” Ueda suggested brightly. “As often as possible.” He peeked at the schedule. “Oh, shit, I’m closing tomorrow.”

Koki nudged Maru. “Remind me to bring a pillow.”

“Who the fuck are you?” Tsubasa said to Kame, staring lewdly at him.

“Akanishi already got to him,” Ueda said pointedly.

Tsubasa looked crushed. “Why can’t we get a pretty new guy on mornings?” He dragged Takki back to the cooler and started bringing out containers.

Koichi had already left, Tsuyoshi right on his heels, and Koki and Maru were on their way out. “Are you coming back tomorrow, Kame-kun?” Maru asked over his shoulder.

“I don’t know,” replied Kame. “Am I?”

Ueda checked the schedule. “If you want. Shift starts at five.”

“I’ll be here at two,” said Kame.

Ueda grinned proudly. “I like this one.”

Ryo glared at him and Ueda rolled his eyes. “Oh, I almost forgot.” He pulled a nametag out of his pocket and tossed it to Kame. “I warned you.”

Kame held up the nametag and groaned. ‘Turtle Power’ was scrawled in Jin’s big loopy English letters, along with a picture of a little turtle giving the peace sign. “Thanks,” he said flatly.

“Come on,” said Ueda, nudging Kame and seizing Ryo by the collar. “Let’s go.”

They stepped outside and Kame began walking towards his apartment building, which really was five hundred meters from the restaurant, mulling the last fourteen hours over in his head. It wasn’t a bad job, not by any means, and with all of this overtime he would probably be able to support himself and his dog. And he would get plenty of sex working with Jin. The rest of them weren’t too bad either. As coworkers went, he couldn’t complain.

It beat turning tricks in the alley behind the pachinko parlor, anyway.

# Vingnette Sequels

> **Ueda/Ryo** ; NC-17; 285 words

“Say it again.”

Ryo arched his back as Ueda hovered over him, damp hair in his eyes and arms wrapped tightly around Ryo’s legs, their skin slapping together with the force of Ueda’s thrusts. “My Tatsu _ya_ ,” Ryo gasped, the final syllable extending into a throaty moan as Ueda hit his spot.

“Again,” Ueda whispered, letting his head fall to Ryo’s chest briefly before snapping it back up, squinting to stare through the cloud of haze.

“ _Ore no Tatsuya_ ,” Ryo groaned, his nails digging into Ueda’s forearms as he tossed his head back and spasmed, a stream of white splashing onto his stomach.

Ueda squeezed his eyes shut as he followed suit, pounding deep into Ryo and moaning softly. “Fuck,” he swore, releasing Ryo’s legs and collapsing on top of him.

“You’re heavy,” Ryo said breathlessly, pushing at Ueda with the last of his energy. “Get the fuck off.”

“I just did, thanks.” Ueda smirked cheekily and snuggled into Ryo’s unwilling embrace.

Sighing in defeat, Ryo wrapped his arms around Ueda and wriggled around uncomfortably beneath him. “I’m fucking sticky, you lazy ass.”

“Nobody forced you to come,” Ueda replied sleepily. “It’s not my fault I can make you come without touching you.”

“Which is the only reason I let you top,” Ryo mumbled, eyes fluttering closed.

“Whatever.” Ueda nuzzled his face into Ryo’s shoulder, brushing his lips against Ryo’s throat. “Shut the fuck up and go to sleep.”

“Don’t tell me what to do, devil princess. You don’t own me like I own you.”

Ueda snorted. “Say it again.”

Ryo’s arms tightened around him, embracing him strongly. “My Tatsuya.”

As Ueda drifted off to sleep, demon clutches and all, Ryo finally allowed himself to smile.

> **Jin/Yamapi** ; R; 769 words

The road to Hell was paved with good intentions, and apparently so was the path to Jin’s front door. Yamapi had snuck into Jin’s house many, many times over the years, and every single time he had set off the alarm and woken up Jin’s entire family.

This time was no different. Jin’s bed hair greeted him at the door, only one eye open, and he ignored Yamapi’s muttered apologies as he struggled to focus on the security panel and punch in the right code. The third time was a charm, and Jin’s mother whacked them both in the head before retreating to the master bedroom.

Jin dragged Yamapi by the wrist down the hall to his room, where he flopped back onto his bed without letting go. Yamapi was pulled along, landing face-to-face with Jin and taking it upon himself to untangle Jin’s sheets and cover them both.

The hopelessly twisted sheets ended up being kicked off the bed along with Yamapi’s clothes – the two were connected somehow, Yamapi supposed – and Jin pulled up his giant fuzzy comforter before squeezing Yamapi to him like he was a teddy bear. “Pi-chan,” he murmured happily. “You smell like work.”

“Sorry,” Yamapi said sadly, burying his nose in Jin’s hair. He had obviously had a shower and smelled like cake batter conditioner. “Do you want me to go wash up?”

Jin shook his head quickly, popping Yamapi in the chin with his forehead. “Not unless I can go with you, and you have to get up in four hours.”

“Five if you lend me some clean clothes,” Yamapi hinted, pressing his lips to Jin’s scalp.

A little whine escaped Jin as he snuggled closer. “Pi- _chan_. You promised you’d let me sleep.”

“You’re already awake,” Yamapi pointed out, conveniently overlooking the fact that it had been his fault. “Besides, you’re the one who stripped me.”

“I like the feel of your skin,” Jin whispered, running his hands up and down Yamapi’s bare back. “I like everything about you.”

Yamapi’s insides felt warm. “I like everything about you too, Jin-chan.”

“Even my fat?”

“Even your fat.” Yamapi grabbed a handful of waist flesh to prove his point and giggled when Jin squirmed. “Sometimes I wish I could have you all to myself,” he admitted.

“Me too,” agreed Jin. “But neither one of us can stay faithful.”

Yamapi nodded into Jin’s hair. “And I don’t have the time to take you out on a proper date.”

“That’s okay,” said Jin. “We can be together like this.”

There was a comfortable silence during which Jin almost fell back asleep, until Yamapi lifted Jin’s chin to look at him. “You’re the only one I would introduce to my kids.”

Jin grinned. “That means a lot, Pi-chan.”

After a lingering kiss on the lips, Jin snuggled into Yamapi’s embrace and promptly fell asleep. Yamapi hugged him close, feeling warm despite his lack of clothing, and let the lull of Jin’s even breath lure him to sleep.

When his phone alarm went off the next morning – _Daite daite daite señorita_ – Jin imitated the dance while lying almost completely on top of Yamapi as he woke up.

“Go back to sleep, Jin-chan,” Yamapi said gruffly in his morning voice. “I’ll just raid your closet and help myself to the shower.”

“Nope,” said Jin smugly, or as smugly as one could look with his eyes still closed. “You’re not going anywhere.”

“I have to go to work,” Yamapi said sadly, trying to detach himself from Jin’s clutches. “I can’t call in all the time like you.”

Jin’s eyelids slowly lifted, uncovering deep brown eyes that stared guiltily at Yamapi. “I set the clock on your phone forward a half hour.”

“You did?” Yamapi yawned. “Why would you do such a -”

Jin pounced on him, fusing his mouth to Yamapi’s neck and taking full advantage of his nudity.

“Jiiiin,” Yamapi whined. “I love you, but I don’t want to do factory work with my ass hurting all day…”

Stilling in his actions, Jin’s voice shook. “You just said it.”

Yamapi smacked his own forehead. “I did. I’m sorry.”

“No,” said Jin firmly, sliding up Yamapi’s body to straddle his waist. “No. Tomohisa -” Yamapi’s breath hitched at the use of his real name “- I want us to say it when we feel it, even if we can’t be together.”

“Okay,” said Yamapi shakily. “I feel that I love you.”

Jin laughed. “I feel that I love you too. And don’t worry,” he added, rubbing against Yamapi suggestively. “Your ass won’t be the one hurting today.”

> **Koki/Maru** ; PG; 828 words

_Making it real doesn’t make it any less_.

The words played over and over again in Maru’s head as he tried – unsuccessfully – to fall asleep. Any other time when he would get “those thoughts” in his mind, he would just push them away and think of something else. Something _straight_ , he amended disconcertedly.

This time, however, he let them marinate. He stared at the ceiling as he recalled his kiss with Koki earlier that evening; contrary to popular belief, that had not been their first. It happened sometimes – more often than not – when their faces ended up close together by chance, and the next thing Maru knew he was feeling Koki’s lips against his. Neither ever pushed the other away, nor did they speak of it afterwards. They just let it end on its own and carry on like it hadn’t happened at all.

No wonder Kamenashi had gotten irritated with them, Maru thought. It didn’t make any sense. They weren’t together – they _weren’t_ , dammit – but everything around them signified that they were. They even kissed, for fuck’s sake. Maru wasn’t sure if he was scared that he would lose his best friend, freaked out about the whole gay thing, or just too much of a pussy to have brought it up yet, but Kame’s words latched onto his brain and would not let go.

Before Maru knew what he was doing, he had thrown off his covers, crossed his room, made his way across their entire apartment in the dark, and hesitated outside of Koki’s door. Normally he would not be the kind of guy who barges into others’ bedrooms at five o’clock in the morning; it was a credit to how determined he was that the pang of guilt for being impolite never came.

Koki slept like the dead. Maru had known this ever since they were fifteen and there had been a fire while they were having a sleepover at Koki’s house. Maru had to literally pick him up and carry him outside to safety, and it wasn’t until ten minutes after the firemen had arrived that Koki blinked open his eyes and mumbled, “Why are we sleeping in the grass, Yuu-chan?”

Now inside Koki’s bedroom, closing the door securely behind them like there was someone else in the house to overhear, Maru was frozen to the spot. Koki snored loudly, sprawled out on his back with his covers on the floor. And no shirt. Maru watched Koki’s firm abdominal muscles rise and fall with each breath he took, almost mesmerizing Maru until he shook himself back to reality and realized he had no idea what he was going to do.

Koki chose that moment to cease sawing logs and popped open one eye, appearing completely unnerved at Maru’s completely random presence in his bedroom. “Did the A/C go out again?”

“I don’t think so,” Maru said softly, slowly approaching the bed.

“Hot as _fuck_ in here,” Koki grumbled, rolling over onto his side – thankfully – and scooping a clump of abandoned sheets to his chest.

Maru shrugged and sat quietly on the mattress, pulling the comforter from the floor to cover himself as he scooted closer to Koki.

“What are you doing,” Koki asked flatly.

“Going to sleep,” Maru replied, covering himself and curling up against Koki’s back.

“Can’t you sleep in your own bed?” Koki huffed, not at all perplexed at Maru’s arm snaking around his waist.

“I could,” Maru answered honestly, hugging Koki close to him, his nose resting in the back of Koki’s neck. “But I’d rather sleep in here.”

“You steal the _covers_ ,” Koki whined.

“You’re not using them,” Maru pointed out. “And you _would_ choose that point to focus on here.”

Koki was silent for so long that Maru thought he had fallen asleep. “Whatever,” he said finally, leaning back against Maru and making a soft noise of content that he would never admit actually came from him. “Your heart is beating really fast.”

“Yes, it is.” Maru tightened his grip, his next words coming out in a puff of air. “I’m scared.”

“It’s not storming, is it?” Koki stretched his neck to peer in the general direction of his window. “I thought you got over that.”

“ _No_ ,” Maru said a little too forcibly. “I mean, it’s not storming.”

Koki exhaled in a way that could have been construed as a sigh if Maru didn’t know any better, waited three seconds – during which Maru’s heart beat even faster – and flipped around, leaning his nose against Maru’s. “Do we really need to have this conversation?”

“I shouldn’t think so.”

Before Koki could respond, Maru tilted his head just enough to press their lips together. Koki responded heatedly – Maru made a mental note to wake him up more often – and wrapped his arms around Maru, holding him close as all of their fears, hopes, and regrets were conveyed without words.

> **Koichi/Tsuyoshi** ; Hard R; 557 words

“I could sleep for a _year_ ,” Tsuyoshi groaned as he crossed the threshold of his one-bedroom apartment, Koichi at his heels.

“You have to open on Sunday,” Koichi pointed out.

“Way to fart on my pancakes,” Tsuyoshi said dryly. “Can’t you just indulge me for once?”

Koichi didn’t say anything; Tsuyoshi honestly thought that he had said something to upset him – sometimes he could be such a girl – at least until he was forcefully thrown down onto the recliner with a agitated-looking redhead cowering over him. “Indulge?” Koichi repeated.

“Yes, Kouchan,” said Tsuyoshi, speaking slowly enough to cover up the arousal in his voice. “Indulge me.”

Koichi’s eyes flicked down, then up, then back down again as he surveyed the man before him. He licked his lips.

“Kouchan,” Tsuyoshi said carefully. “Why do you look like you want to eat me?”

A smirk crossed Koichi’s otherwise unexpressive face as he lowered his head to Tsuyoshi’s lap. Tsuyoshi had to resist the urge to buck his hips upwards as Koichi’s lips made contact with his cock through his clothes. If he hadn’t been hard already, he certainly was now, and he wasn’t about to pop Koichi in the nose with it. “Kouchan, what are you doing?”

“Indulging you,” Koichi answered simply, the vibrations of his deep voice making it even more difficult for Tsuyoshi to remain still. “Do you want me to stop?”

“No!” Tsuyoshi almost screamed. He composed himself and glared down at Koichi. “What are you waiting for, a written invitation?”

Koichi blinked, resting his chin on the base of Tsuyoshi’s erection and sliding up and down.

“I love you,” Tsuyoshi said heatedly. “You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Without you I would be lost. Please, please ‘indulge’ me..?”

Blinking again, Koichi reached for Tsuyoshi’s belt and paused at the buckle, closing his lips around the hard flesh as far as he could reach. Tsuyoshi groaned and arched his back, indirectly straining his arousal further; Koichi held him down firmly by both hips and stared upwards. “Impatient much?”

“Koichi, I have had four hours of sleep and three full shifts in the past two days – _unnnnnnnnnh_.” Tsuyoshi’s linguistic skills flew out of his ear when Koichi made quick work of his pants and engulfed his cock whole, wasting absolutely no time establishing a rhythm that made Tsuyoshi’s entire body quiver. “ _Kouchan_.”

Koichi never took his eyes off him, bobbing up and down like he had been doing this for years. In reality, he had; it had been so long that he knew exactly where to press his tongue, where to scrape his teeth, and where to tighten his suction to have Tsuyoshi exploding down his throat in less than five minutes.

He wiped his mouth and balanced himself on Tsuyoshi’s thighs, staring up at the man who looked like he had been knocked unconscious by the force of his own orgasm. Closer scrutiny proved him to be sleeping, and very deeply.

Sighing, Koichi righted Tsuyoshi’s clothing and crawled into his lap, tugging over a nearby throw blanket to cover them. Tsuyoshi whimpered slightly as Koichi got comfortable, then made a happy noise in his sleep when Koichi kissed him on the nose and curled up into Tsuyoshi’s arms that automatically enveloped him.

He’d make it up to him tomorrow.


End file.
